Thorns and Roses
by BeastlyRedemption
Summary: Bella Swan, a 17 year old CEO moves to Forks, Washington to get away from her controlling mother. What happens when she meets five strangers, and takes interest in a certain blonde? It's Twilight re-written RoseXBella style. Bella isn't weak, and Rose isn't controlling like Edward. Can they save each other?
1. Forks

**A.N. I know that this has maybe been done before, I just wanted to try my own hand at things. It won't be like the book very much, but there will still be some similarities. And Rosalie won't be like Dickward, all dramatic, creepy, lying, and controlling. She'll be the opposite of all of those things. The first chapter is going to be really similar to the book, but everything after that will derive from it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, SM does. If I did, Bella would be tough, probably a secret agent, and she would end up with Rosalie or Alice. And none of the pain and angst of New Moon would have happened.**

* * *

I was driving myself to the airport with the windows rolled down. Watching my chestnut hair gleam red with the sun. It was seventy-five degrees here in Phoenix, the sky a perfect, cloudless blue. I wore my favorite shirt, one deemed comfortable for the plane ride – sleeveless, white eyelet lace; I wore it as a farewell gesture. My carry-on items were some trading documents and a black parka. My mother was calling.

"I don't understand why you are being absurdly ridiculous, you already have your GED and have been through college. Why on Earth are you going to High school?" My mother was angry, I expected it though – it was hardly ever a surprise, no matter what I did it was never good enough. _Maybe because I'm only seventeen. Maybe because I_'_m CEO of a multi-billionaire industry. Maybe because I miss my stranger of a Father. Maybe because I think you know that you are destroying me. Why don't you love me? _I sighed.

"Renée, I want to see my Father, and maybe get a normal experience at life. I'm not sure why you are angry about this; you know I won't slack off on my work." I tried to console her, but then again, Renée couldn't be consoled.

"You are embarrassing me. Do you know what the chair members think of your immature acts? Really, Isabella! How do you expect to do your duties from that run down town?" She whispered angrily through the static lines of the phone. I sighed again. Everything I have ever done either disappointed the angry business women or embarrassed her.

"Renée, I have a merger in the works. I gave them a deadline by Wednesday week. I have them in the hooks. They won't have enough to save themselves should they decline." I said the last part with absolutely no emotion. Renée would know. And I would be severely punished if she found out that I was upset for ruining people's lives. I remember all too well the harsh words that I had been slashed with as a child. Needless to say; I've learned from my mistakes.

"How much will our stats raise?" That was good, she seemed sated

"If my plans go through we should be the first trillionaires that the world has seen in twenty-five years." I said, stepping out of my black Aventador Lamborghini. Ducking under the butterfly doors, I grabbed both of my suitcases. One was filled with school clothes and school stuff. The other was more formal, filled with business clothing and letters to be shipped off.

"Make sure it does, Isabella." She snapped before she hung up. I pressed the phone tighter to my ear. I imagined her words twisting into saying something foreign. Maybe "Bella, you don't have to do this." Or "I'll see you soon. You can come back whenever you want – I'll come right back as soon as you need me. I love you." It just didn't sound right. It sounded alien.

In the Olympic Peninsula of northwest Washington State, a small town named Forks exists under a near-constant cover of clouds. It rains on this inconsequential town more than any other place in the United States of America. In this town – despite its gloomy, omnipresent shade – was where my mother had married my father. He wasn't anything special, not rich and clumsy. I don't know what Renée was doing with him. My only guess was that he was the only person that she had even come close to loving.

"Ms. Spina?" Mr. Anderson asked. He was my PA, and I was grateful for it. It really wasn't that easy being the only seventeen year old CEO of Spina industries. "Your plane is about to board, I'll have your car taken care of but I think it's best if you leave before the Paparazzi shows." He was having my car shipped to Forks, Washington. Renée had insisted, not for my well-being, never for that, but because I was a trophy to be showed off and flaunted. She wanted the people of Forks to see that I was rich, which in her mind, meant that I am better than them.

I nodded. "Of course, Mr. Anderson." I slipped the glasses off of my head and onto my face. I had learned long ago that people could read my emotions easier through my eyes, having tinted sunglasses shut them out. It was habitual, a safety blanket for me whenever I started to feel anything akin to emotion.

Mr. Anderson looked at me tightly for a moment, deciphering my shades, and then I got on the plane and he was gone.

It was a total of five hours for flight time. Four hours from Phoenix to Seattle and then another hour to Port Angeles. After that, Charlie, my father, had agreed readily to pick me up for the hour long drive to Forks. I saw the shake of the airplane's wings and a flood of worry plummeted into my stomach. I wasn't scared of flying, it was the hour long ride with Charlie. He was my father, but still a stranger. I hadn't seen him since I was six.

Charlie had been… excited for my announcement, if Charlie could ever get excited. He was pleased that I was coming to live with him from now on. He knew all about my CEO status with the implied 'filthy rich' too. He knew about how I had my GED and went to Dartmouth at the age of thirteen. I explained to him that I wanted the High school experience, so he registered me into Forks High school.

When I landed in Port Angeles, it was raining. I didn't see that as an omen – just unavoidable. I had already said my goodbyes to the heat and sun.

Charlie was waiting for me with the police cruiser. I was expecting this too. Charlie donned a black bomber jacket with the Chief's badge over his left breast. That was one reason I didn't try to fight Renée on shipping my car up here. Nothing slows down traffic like a cop, especially the Chief of Police.

Charlie caught me when I stumbled off of the plane and gave me an awkward one-armed side-hug.

"I missed you, Bells," he said, smiling fixing my stance so I was more stable. "You haven't changed as much as I can tell. How's Renée?"

"She's perfect. It's good to see you, Ch – Dad." I had to remember that this stranger was my father. He deserved the title. Charlie towed the two bags of mine into the trunk, which fit very easily.

We started down the road once we were both strapped in. A couple of comments about the weather happened, which was wet. After the failed attempts we just stared out of the windows in an easy silence.

Forks was beautiful of course; I couldn't deny it. Everything was green, alive: the trees, the branches, the ferns and even the air had a strange haze of green to it. It contrasted greatly from the dry red scenery that I was so used to seeing.

After the promised hour, we made it to Charlie's house. He still lived in the two story, with only two bedrooms, house that he'd bought with my mother in the happy days of their marriage.

"Dad, I wish you'd move into the house that I had bought." I nagged at him. I had asked him if he would move into the open mansion that the late Mayor had left to anyone who had enough money to buy it. I left Arizona to get away from Renée, I didn't want to live in a house that only reminded me of her. Charlie had refused, he still hadn't got over Renée. The Mayor's mansion was quickly becoming our first argument.

"You bought it?" Charlie asked, his face heating a quick red. "Isabella! I told you—"

"I know, Dad. It was one of Renée's terms though. I wish you would at least consider it. The house is closer to the City Hall – you could get to work faster."

"It's farther away from the school." He grumbled back at me. I suspected his real problem with the house was pride. Nothing hurts the male's pride more than buying him stuff he can't afford. But really, the house was nearing the million dollar mark.

"It'd only take me an extra minute. If not for you, then for me. I could get so much more done for my branch in the larger house." I paused. "I am really sorry, Dad. I'm not trying to push you. I don't understand how it feels to let something you love go," _Because I don't love anything. Maybe expect for you, in time._ "But please just think it over." I requested, almost pleaded with him. Renée had expected us to live in that house. If she saw that I could possibly live in this one she would have a heart attack. I started to get out of the car to retrieve my bags when Charlie pulled my arm.

"We'll talk about it later okay? Not today, I want you to get settle in. This week? When I'm off work?" He blushed, looking down at the dashboard. I nodded without him seeing.

"Of course, Dad. Whatever you want."

It only took me one trip to get all my stuff upstairs, denying Charlie's assistance. I got the west bedroom that faced over the front yard. The room was scary familiar; it had been mine until I was six. The wooden floor, the light blue walls, the peaked ceiling, the white laced curtains around my window – these were all part of my vague childhood memories. The only changes I could detect was the queen size bed, the black glass desk, and the flat screen TV.

There was a bathroom in the left hallway of the stairs, which I would share with Charlie. I tried not to dwell too much on that fact.

The biggest difference between Charlie and Renée was that he didn't hover. He let me unpack by myself and get situated. Renée would have been over my shoulder, watching like an angry hawk. It was nice to be alone, not to smile and looked pleased for the woman. I had never felt so free. I had some documents that I had to go over about the merge that I was working on, but I would save that for bedtime, when I would be alone with my thoughts.

Forks High school had a total of three hundred and fifty-seven – now fifty-eight – students. All of the kids here had grown up together – their grandparents had been toddlers together. I would be the new girl from the big city. The girl with the sociopathic smart brain, who was a billionaire business woman, coming to their school. I would be an attraction, a curiosity, a freak.

Maybe, if I looked like a girl from Phoenix should, I could work this into my advantage. But I'd never fit in anywhere. I _should_ be tan, sporty, blonde, and pretty – a volley ball player, or a cheerleader, perhaps – all things that go with living in the valley of the sun.

Instead, I was ivory skinned, set off by my dark chestnut hair and my brown eyes, despite the constant sunshine. I have always been slender, soft, but over these past few months I was boarding unhealthy slim. I wasn't an athlete obviously, Renée wouldn't allow her prized possession to be hurt, and that I lacked the necessary hand-eye coordination.

When I finished putting my clothes in the pine dresser, I took my bag of ordered necessities and went to the bathroom to clean the airplane air and travel off of me. I looked at my face in the bathroom curiously as I brushed through my long, tangled damp hair. Maybe it was the light or my work, but I already looked a hundred times more sallow, unhealthy. My skin could be pretty – it was very clear, I never had a blemish a day in my life, almost translucent looking – but it all depended on color and sleep. I have neither.

Facing my pallid reflection in the mirror, I was forced to admit, that I was lying to myself. It wasn't just physically that I'd never fit in. I was too odd. Too scary.

I never fit in with people my age, not in my first school years, but in college either. The truth was that I didn't relate well with people, period. Not even to the fifty-plus year old board members. It was hard getting people to see things my way, not because of my age, but because my plans were out of the box. Sometimes I wondered if I was seeing the same things through my eyes that the rest of the world was seeing through theirs. There obviously was a glitch in my brain. But honestly, the cause didn't matter. All that mattered was the effect. Tomorrow would only be the beginning of my doom or my salvation.

* * *

I didn't get much sleep that night, even after I was done reading the trade requests. I found some questionable legal citations, but other than that, everything looked good. The constant _whooshing_ of rain and wind across the roof wouldn't fade into the background. I almost missed the immediate noise that crickets made when the sun set to sleep, or the croaking of frogs when they're disturbed. I paced my room, thinking, and didn't stop until my feet started to ache. But I still didn't fall asleep until midnight, when the rainfall settled into a quitter drizzle.

I awoke to dark lights. I slept more than I had ever before, so I was well rested. I looked out of my window and all I could see was thick fog. You would almost never sky the sky here; it was like a cage.

Breakfast with Charlie was a very quiet event. I didn't eat anything and he noticed. I told him I wasn't hungry, after frowning he wished me good luck at school. I nodded and thanked him, even though I knew it was hopeless. Good luck tended to avoid me when it could. Charlie left first, off to the police station that was his wife and family. After he left, I sat at the old mismatched oak tables and examined his small kitchen. The dark paneled walls contrasted with the white cupboards. Nothing changed. Over the fireplace in the adjoining handkerchief-sized family room was a row of pictures. First was a wedding picture of Charlie and Renée in Italy, then one of me earning my National Junior Honor Society placement, followed by me receiving my degree in business last year. It seemed like a long time since then, I had done so much.

It was impossible, being in this house, not to realize that Charlie had never moved on from us. It made me feel guilty.

I didn't want to be too early to school, but it was a probably good idea so I could find all of my classes. I donned my jacket and headed out into the rain.

It was just drizzling still, not enough to soak me through completely immediately as I reached under the eaves by the door to lock up. The sloshing of my new waterproof boots was unnerving. I didn't miss the normal crunch of gravel as I walked though. Suddenly, I stopped. There in my driveway was my car. Stunned I walked to the slip of paper underneath the windshield wipers and pulled it out.

_Have a good day at school today, Bella. – Mr. A_

I chuckled, well at least I wouldn't have to walk two miles to school today. I opened the door to find the keys in the ignition. The engine stated up as easily as it always did and the heaters kicked on, warming me up.

Finding the school wasn't difficult. Just like everything else, the school was just off of the highway. It was not obvious that it was a school, only the wood and yellow sign declaring that they were Forks' Spartans gave the indication.

I parked in front of the building, which had a small sign over the door reading FRONT OFFICE. No one else was parked here, so maybe it was off limits. Granted it was early, and I wasn't going to keep circling in the rain like an idiot. I stepped unwillingly under my door and into the cold. I walked down a little stone path hedged with dark plants. After a deep breath and an insistence of steady voices, I opened the door.

Inside, it was brightly lit, and warmer than I'd hoped. The office wasn't surprisingly small; a little waiting area with padded folding chairs, orange-flecked commercial carpets, notices and awards cluttering the walls, a big clock ticking loudly. Plants grew everywhere in large, orange, plastic pots, as if there wasn't already enough outside. The room was cut in half by a long counter, cluttered, like the walls, with wire baskets full of papers and brightly colored flyers taped to its front. There were three desks behind the counter, one of which was controlled by an elderly, red-haired woman wearing wired glasses. She was wearing a t-shirt, which immediately made me feel overdressed.

The lady looked up. "May I help you?"

"I'm Isabella Spina," I informed her. "My father, Charlie, may have registered me as a Swan." I saw the quick look of awareness light her eyes. I was gossip here, not unlike the rest of the world. The rich eccentric daughter of the Chief's flighty ex-wife, come home at last.

"H-he did, I could change that, if you'd like? I'm sorry I didn't recognize you sooner – I should have, you're all over the news." She fumbled around in a couple stacks of paper.

"Please, don't bother yourself. I don't mind." I assured her, worried that she was going into a cardiac-arrest with all of the blushing and stuttering she was doing.

"O-okay. Here, I have your schedule right here, and a map of the school." She stuttered again, bringing the papers over to the counter to show me.

She went through my classes with me, highlighting the best route on each map, and gave me a slip to have each teacher sign, which I was to bring back at the end of the day. She smiled at me and hoped, like Charlie, that I would like it here in Forks. I smiled at her as convincingly as I could, when she said that if I had any questions come to her.

When I walked back outside to my car, other students were starting to arrive. I drove around the school, following the line of traffic. I wasn't surprised to see that the cars here were very old, nothing flashy. At home, it wasn't uncommon to see a new Mercedes or Porsche. The nicest car next to mine was a shiny Volvo, it stood out greatly. Still, I cut the engine as soon as I was in spot, every eye was on my car, and I was glad for the tinted windows.

I looked at the map again, even though I had already rememorized it, and straightened the red tie over my white dress shirt. I breathed in and smoothed out the wrinkles in my black dress pants. These were my school clothes, it was Renée, always insisting that I look my best. I stuffed everything into my plain black backpack, and slug it over one shoulder. I sucked a deep breath in. I can do this, I've stood higher than men in business rooms, and I've closed deals and stood against allegations against my company. I am Isabella Swan-Spina. I am powerful, rich, and cunningly smart – well, according to New York Times anyway. I _can_ do this, nobody is going to bite me. I made sure my mirrored Aviator sunglasses were on top of my head.

I rolled my shoulders back and kept my head up as I walked. _Always show them that you are better than them, that they don't scare you_, this was one of Renée's favorite phrases. I stood out, the sidewalk with crowded teenagers, who stopped talking to stare, and why shouldn't they? They all knew who I am, the question was 'what they hell is she doing here?'

Once I got around the cafeteria, the classrooms were easy to find. A large black sign with the teacher's name hung over the door. I felt my breathing gradually creeping towards hyperventilation as I approached the door. I held my breath, following after two unisex coats into the classroom.

The class was small. The people in front of me stopped to hang their coats up, I watched them. They were two girls, one a wheat-colored blonde, the other also pale, with mousy colored hair. At least my skin wouldn't be standing out here.

I took the slip up to a tall balding man, whose desk plate identified him as Mr. Mason. He gawked at me when he looked at me, and saw my name. I slipped to glasses onto my eyes to hide my embarrassment. But he sent me to the back desk without introducing me to class – he didn't need to. It was more difficult for the students to stare at me in the back, somehow they managed. I kept my eyes down to the list the teacher had passed out. It was basic: Shakespeare, Chaucer, and Faulkner… I'd already read all of this. That was comforting, and boring. I could tell Renée this, she'd argue with me, telling me that my decision was stupid. I thought of different discussions in my head while the teacher went over the list.

When the bell rang after fifty-four minutes, a gangly boy with uneven skin tones and hair black as an oil slick, leaned over the aisle to talk to me.

"You're Isabella Spina, aren't you?" He looked like the over-helpful type.

"Bella Swan," I corrected. Everyone with a three seat radius turned to look at me. I pulled the glasses back on my head, what little light had just disappeared behind a cloud.

"What's your next class?" He asked.

I didn't have to check my bag. "Government, with Jefferson, in class six."

There was nowhere to look without meeting curious eyes.

"I'm headed towards class four, I could show you the way…" Over-helpful. "I'm Eric," he added with a smile.

I smiled back softly. "Thanks."

He got his jacket and we headed out of the class. I could have sworn the several people behind us were close enough to eavesdrop. Maybe my paranoia was resurfacing.

"So, this is a lot different than Phoenix, huh?" He asked.

"Very."

"It doesn't rain much there, does it?"

"Only about three or four times a year."

"Wow, what must that be like," he wondered

"Sunny." I told him

"You don't look very tan."

"My mother is an albino witch."

He studied me apprehensively, and I sighed and frowned at him. It looked like the clouds and whatever small sense of humor I had didn't mix. A few months of this and I'll probably forget how to speak sarcasm.

We walked around the back of the cafeteria, to the south buildings by the gym. Eric walked me right to the door, apparently not caring if he was going to be late to class – weird too, the door was clearly marked.

"Well, good luck," he said as my fingers scraped the door handle. "Maybe we'll have some classes together." He sounded hopeful.

I smiled at him vaguely and went inside.

The rest of the morning passed in about the same fashion. My Math teacher told me I was in the wrong class, because it was meant for senior students. Mr. Varner also made me stand in the front of the classroom, even though they all knew who I was.

After two classes, I started to recognize several faces in each class. There was always someone braver than the rest who would introduce themselves to me, they would also ask questions about me and my work. I tried to be diplomatic, but really I just lied, a lot.

One girl sat next to me in both Math and Italian, and she walked with me to the cafeteria for lunch. She was tiny, several inches shorter than my five feet four inches, but her wild, dark, curly hair made up a lot of distance. I didn't catch her name, so I smiled and nodded while she went on and on about teachers. I didn't keep up.

We sat at the end of a full table with several of her friends who she introduced me to. I remembered their names the second they were voiced. They seemed stunned by her bravery in speaking to me. The boy from English, Eric, waved at me from across the room.

It was there, sitting in the lunch room, trying to make conversation with seven curious strangers, that I first saw them.

They were sitting in the far corner of the cafeteria, as far away from me as possible in the long room. There were five of them. They weren't talking, and they weren't eating, though they each had a tray of untouched food in front of them. They weren't gawking at me, unlike most of the other students, so it was safe to stare at them without the fear of meeting an excessively interested pair of eyes. But it was none of these things that caught, and held, my attention.

They didn't look anything alike. Of the three boys, one was big – muscled like a serious weight lifter, with dark, curly hair. Another was taller, leaner, but still muscular, and honey blond. The last was lanky, less bulky, with untidy, bronze- colored hair. He was more boyish than the others, like he belonged in High school, the others looked like they would be more fitted in college.

The girls were opposites. The short girl was pixie like, thin in extreme, with small features. Her hair was deep black, cropped short and pointing in every different direction. The tall one was statuesque. She had a beautiful figure, the kind that you see on the cover of _Sports Illustrated _swimsuit issue, the kind that made every girl knock down her own self-esteem just by being in the same room as her. Her smooth, soft looking, hair was a golden blonde, gently waving to the middle of her back. I stared at her the longest. Not because she was incredibly, breath taking, heart stopping gorgeous – she was, but because she seemed so _sad _and _lonely_. The way she furrowed her eyebrows at the table in front of her, or the way she bit her lip screamed that she needed a hug, that she needed attention. She seemed tense, her long, beautiful, pale fingers tapped at the table in random notes, like she was playing the piano.

And yet, they were all exactly alike. Every one of them was chalky pale, the palest of all the students living in this sunless town. Paler than me, the albino. They all had very dark eyes despite the range in hair tones. They also had dark shadows underneath those eyes – purplish, bruise like shadows. As if they were all recovering from a broken nose. Though their noses, all of their features, were straight, perfect, and angular.

But all this is not why I couldn't look away.

I stared because their faces, so different, so similar, were all devastatingly, inhumanly, beautiful. They were the faces you never expected to see except perhaps on the airbrushed pages of a fashion magazine. Or painted by an old master as the face of an angel. It wasn't hard to decide who was more beautiful – clearly it was the perfect, blonde Aphrodite.

"Who are _they?"_ I asked, Jessica, the girl from Italian and Math.

As she looked up to see who I meant – though already knowing, probably, from my tone – suddenly he looked at her, the thinnest one, the boyish one. He looked at her for a second before looking at me. He looked away and started to speak to his neighbors, his mouth moving very quickly. The beautiful blonde frowned deeper and her ultra-white teeth let her clutch grip on her lip go, before turning to look at me. My breath caught in my throat, her dark – golden? – Eyes scanned my face for a second before she looked away, quickly, faster than I could. I slipped my glasses back onto my face, looking down at the table.

Jessica giggled in embarrassment, looking at the table like I did.

"That's Edward, Emmett, and Alice Cullen, and Rosalie and Jasper Hale; they all live together with Dr. Cullen and his wife." She said this under her breath.

I glanced sideways at the beautiful girl, who was looking at her tray now, picking a bagel to pieces with her long, pale, fingers. Her mouth was moving very quickly, her perfect lips barley opening. The others looked at her, attention solely focused on her glorious face.

_Strange, unpopular names, _I thought. The kinds of names grandparents had. But maybe that was all the rage here – small town names? Contrary-wise the girl, Jessica, had a name that was perfectly common. In my Business class at Dartmouth, there were two girls named Jessica.

"They are … very nice looking." I struggled with the conspicuous understatement.

"Yes!" Jessica agreed with another giggle. "They're all _together_ though – Emmett and Edward, and Jasper and Alice, I mean. And they _live_ together." _The voice all shock and condemnation of a small town_, I thought critically. But, if I were being honest, it would cause gossip in Phoenix as well.

"Which ones are the Cullens?" I asked, slightly annoyed with the girl next to me. "They don't look related…."

"Oh, they're not. Dr. Cullen is super young. They're all adopted. The Hales _are_ brother and sister, twins – the blondes – and they're foster children."

"They look a little too old to be foster children."

"They are now, Jasper and Rosalie are both seventeen, but they've been with Mrs. Cullen since they were seven. She's their aunt or something like that."

"That's really nice of them – to take care of all those kids like that, when they're so young."

"I guess so," Jessica admitted reluctantly, and I got the impression that she didn't like the doctor and his wife for some reason. With the glances that she was throwing their adoptive children, I would presume the reason was jealousy. "I think that Mrs. Cullen can't have any kids, though," she added, as if somehow that lessened their kindness. It was a ridiculous notion.

Throughout the whole conversation, my eyes flickered again and again to the un-eating family.

"They haven't always lived here?" I asked. Surely, from my summers here, I would've noticed the beautiful strangers.

"No," she said in a tone that implied that it should have been obvious, even to a new comer like me. "They moved down here two years ago from somewhere in Alaska."

As I examine them again, Aphrodite looked at me again, this time a fierce glare clear on her face. As I looked away swiftly, it occurred to me that she seemed to be trying to frighten me off.

"The blonde one is Rosalie?" I asked. I peeked at her sideways, she was still glaring, and it felt like two hot pines on the side of my face. I pushed the glasses tighter to my eyes.

"Yeah, she's gorgeous, of course. We call her the Ice queen. She's turned five of the straightest people I know into lesbians just like that," she snapped her fingers for emphasis. "I wouldn't waste my time though. Apparently she doesn't date – none of the boys or the girls are good enough for her." She sniffed a clear case of sour grapes. I wondered if one of those five people were her, and when Rosalie Hale turned her down.

I bit my lip to hide my coming smile. Then I glanced at her. Her face was turned down to the table again, one side of her lip twitching upwards, almost like she knew what was going on in our conversation.

After a few more minutes, the five of them left the table together. They were all noticeably graceful – even the big, brawny one. It was extremely unsettling to watch. The one named Rosalie didn't look at me again.

One of my new acquaintances, who nicely reminded me her name was Angela, even if I didn't need it, said she had Biology II with me next. We walked together in silence, she was shy too.

We entered the classroom, Angela went to sit at a black-topped table like the ones that I was used to. She already had a neighbor. In fact, all of the tables were filled up but one. In the back aisle, I recognized the small pixie girl, named Alice Cullen with her strange spiky hair. I walked up to the teacher to get my slip signed – he too, gawked at me.

He told me to go sit down next to Alice. I did so with an unfamiliar anticipation. She glanced up from the watery window the smile at me. It nearly blinded. I sat down into my seat, watching her with curious eyes, she giggled and stuck out a hand.

"Hello, Isabella. I am Alice Cullen." She tilted her head at me, I realized she had given me the option of my name instead of everybody assuming that I liked to be called Bella.

"Bella, please." I shook her hand. She grinned at me again, and the teacher called for attendance. I noticed as I turned around to face the teacher, Alice had paused, her hand still in the air, with a sort of blank expression on her face. She snapped out of it quickly though, grinning like the Cheshire cat, turning around too. He passed out some papers for us to study for a test and then gave us free time.

Alice turned around towards me.

"How are you liking Forks so far?" She asked her voice matching her impish face.

"It's good. Great." I told her, baffled as to why she would want to talk to me.

"Really?" She wrinkled her nose in disdain, "I'd much rather be living in Phoenix."

I laughed, sort of. "Not for me, it's too crowded."

"Oh, is that right, Ms. Multi-billionaire?" She laughed right back. I quickly felt a grin growing over my face, she was infectious – everything about her was light, airy, and free. I nodded, taking on a solemn look and sighed at her.

"Everything is so hard. Being rich isn't all it seems. You have to find the right people to cook your food and do your laundry. I remember I fired this girl for using the wrong detergent. People just can't get it right! I broke a nail screaming at her." I sighed mockingly and put my hand to my forehead in melodrama. Alice blurted out laughing, holding her stomach. I smiled, proud that I could please somebody – even if I was making fun of myself. Nobody hates me more than me though, so, it only made sense.

The bell rang and Alice said she'd hoped she would see me tomorrow. I nodded at her, smiling softly, and slipped the glasses onto my head.

I walked into the warm office to return my paper slips at the end of the day. I walked, almost happily to the front desk to the smiling receptionist, and handed her my papers.

"How did your first day go, dear?" She asked almost maternally.

"Very pleasant, thank you." I said, my voice soft. She looked convinced.

When I got to my car, it was about the last one there. The only other one was the silver Volvo I had observed earlier that day. I again felt two hot stings on the side of my face and turned around. The Cullens and Hales were around the Volvo, they were all staring at me. _Okay, that's very creepy._ I frowned at them, considering calling out and asking what was wrong. Instead Alice blinked and waved at me smiling. I slipped the glasses onto my face, noting how the one named Jasper frowned, and waved my fingers back in her direction before stepping into the car. It seemed like a haven to me, heating me up from the damp green hole outside.

I turned the key and pulled out of the student parking lot. I fought thoughts and images of a perfect, stunning blonde the whole way to Charlie's house.

* * *

**Okay, first chapter down. Tell me if I should write more.**


	2. Panic and Warmth

**A.N. Okay first of all, THANK YOU GUYS SO, SO, SO, SO, MUCH FOR REVIEWING AND FAVORITING AND FOLLOWING! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUC IT MEANS TO ME! I LOVE YOU GUYS. Is that weird or?..**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, SM does, I only make her characters snarky, narcissistic, and weird.**

* * *

"I would like to direct your attention to sub text four-hundred twelve, to section thirteen, and finally to sub text section one-hundred thirty-nine. Here you'll find the subject that adheres to the missionary i.e. subjective victim holding. I would also like to direct your attention to Mr. Ramsbotham's voluntary statement, he said that whereas, on or about the night prior to the product malfunction…"

I was on the phone with Mr. Applebee, the top councilor, going over the legal merge, but somehow had gotten off track to how a product of their company had malfunctioned.

"Hey, Bells?" My head snapped up from the manila folder on my desk to look at Charlie, who was standing uncertainly in my doorway. "Can we talk? That is if you're not too busy." He stammered, waving both hands out at me, as if he were stopping traffic. I _was _busy, before Mr. Applebee had gone off track, I hoped to get him back on, but as I listened to him ramble on and on about a ram's butt or something, it was clear that wasn't going to happen.

"I apologize, Mr. Applebee. A family emergency had come up quite suddenly. I'm afraid I'll have to adjourn this meeting to some other time." I said, quickly, and didn't wait for a reply before I hung up. I wondered how much trouble I'd be in with Renée. It really didn't matter though, Charlie was my first priority.

"Yeah, Dad. Is anything wrong?" My own voice was quickly becoming nervous as well. I had been good. My grades hadn't dropped and I hadn't gotten into any trouble with the teachers or student peers. Maybe this had something it do with how Edward Cullen hadn't been to school in the past week, or how the ethereal Rosalie Hale hadn't stopped glaring at me as if I were the bane of her existence.

"No, nothing is wrong, I just… You know, whatever you do in life, I'll always support you." I watched him move as he said that, picking him apart with my eyes, he was nervous. His right hand reached up to the back of his neck, and his face avoided my probing stare. He was trying to say more than what he did.

"Thank you so much, Dad. That really means a lot to me." I didn't say it as a thanks, I said it slowly, getting it across to Charlie that I really didn't know what he meant to say. He blushed and shifted on his feet, the hand that had been rubbing his neck worked tenfold.

"No, no. I-I meant. I meant. Uh… So – so, a buddy of mine at work has a daughter, she goes to the same school, and…" He stammered out painfully. I grimaced, I didn't even know what he was talking about and it was making _me_ uncomfortable.

"Would you like me to make friends with her?" Anything to make Charlie at ease again.

"No… She started dating. But it's not any guy here, it's. Uh… Damn! It's a girl, Bella. She's dating a girl." He finished his slow rant in a bout of frustrated anger. I worked quickly to placate him.

"That's fantastic, Dad. Is she happy in her relationship?" He nodded and went on.

"Yeah, but that's not what I wanted to tell you." He murmured in my general direction, the blush fading from his cheeks. I sat in my desk chair, watching him like he was a zoo animal.

"Then what, Dad?" I wondered, ever patient.

"If you… are _gay_, Bella. I would still accept you, and whoever is lucky enough to catch your attention. I want you to know that you don't have to hide it from me. I know your mother would disagree, but I love you, and it really doesn't matter to me." Charlie said, with a flush of fatherly confidence, and smiled at me. My jaw dropped in astonishment, had Charlie really just said that to me? Just accepted the possibility of his daughter batting for the other team? I fell out of my chair and threw my arms around him, tight. I stiffened immediately.

I hadn't been touched by anyone – other than the obligatory handshakes, painful squeezes, and Phil's treatment – since I was six. Charlie was warm, soft. The smell of pine trees and paperwork assaulted my senses. I didn't know how to _hug_ properly. He tugged his arms around my waist and pressed his face into my hair, making the action easier for me.

Charlie chuckled, the pleasant hum reverberating through his chest. He breathed in. "I would actually prefer, I think, if you were into women. Men are dogs; they can get you pregnant."

I laughed and pulled away from him slightly. "Know this from experience, Dad?" He stepped away from me, grinning, and pulled at his collar.

"Yes. You may not know it, Bells, but your dear old man was a real heartbreaker back in the day." He was joking, having a good time, but I knew how to read in between the lines.

"I wouldn't worry, Dad. I'm too busy with work to start considering my sexuality or who I want to date. But if I do take interest in someone, you'll be the first to know." I told him softly, ducking my head to capture his darting eyes. He nodded, again. "I'll get dinner going, okay?"

Last night I'd discovered that Charlie couldn't cook much besides fried eggs and bacon. So I requested that I be assigned kitchen detail for the duration of my stay. He was more than willing to hand over the keys to the banquet hall. I also found out that he had no food in the house, well, real food anyway. I went to Thriftway, the only grocery store in town.

"What's for dinner?" He asked warily, as he followed me down into the kitchen. Renée had tried cooking when she was married to Charlie; she doesn't know how, generally she had somebody to cook for her. I checked the fridge.

"Steak and potatoes," I answered, and he looked relieved. I gave him a toothy grin.

He seemed to feel awkward standing in the kitchen doing nothing; he lumbered into the living room to watch TV while I worked. We were both more comfortable that way. I made a side salad while the steaks cooked, and set the table.

I called him in when dinner was ready, he sniffed appreciatively as he walked into the room.

"Smells fantastic, Bell."

"Thanks, Dad."

We ate in silence for a few minutes. It wasn't uncomfortable. Neither of us was bothered by the quiet. In some ways, we were well suited to live with each other.

"I'm sorry I haven't asked. How's school been going? Have you made any friends?" He asked, as he cut into his steak.

"Well, I have a few classes with these kids, Jessica and Mike," I chuckled as he made a face. "Alice Cullen and I share a table in Biology, we're friends. At least, I think so anyway. Everybody is very nice." With one outstanding exception, anyway. Emmett, Jasper, and Alice nod hello to me when I pass them in the halls. Rosalie glares, and Edward hasn't been to school. I wondered how Emmett was handling that, has he left town or is he just at home, sick?

"Dr. Cullen's kid?" Charlie asked, looking very surprised.

"Yes. You know them?" I was surprised right back. Although, I really didn't have any right to be. This is Forks, after all.

"Yeah, Dr. Cullen's a great man."

"They… the kids… are a little different." I said slowly, picking through my words. "They don't seem to fit in."

Charlie down right shocked me by looking angry.

"People in this town," Charlie muttered. "Dr. Cullen is a brilliant surgeon who could probably work in any hospital and make ten times the salary he gets here," He continued, getting louder. "We're lucky to have him – lucky his wife wanted to live in a small town. He's an assist to the community, and all of those kids are well behaved and polite. I had my doubts, when they first moved in with all those adopted teenagers. I thought we might have some problems with them. But they're all very mature – I haven't had one speck of trouble from any of them. That's more than I can say for the children of some folks who have lived in this town for generations. And they stick together the way a family should – camping trips every other weekend …. Just because they're new comers, people have to talk."

It was undoubtedly the longest speech I've ever heard Charlie make. He obviously feels strongly about what the people of Forks are saying.

I backpedaled, I didn't mean to sound like that, and I only meant to make conversation – another example of things I'm terrible with. "Dad, please. I was only observing. They are all extremely nice to me – nicer than anyone in the school." I wasn't sure if that was enough for an apology. "They're all very attractive," I added, trying to be more complimentary.

"You should see the doctor." Charlie said, laughing. "It's a good thing he's happily married, the nurses have a hard time focusing on their work with him around."

I finished my food before Charlie had, and leaned back to watch him. I noticed he ate very neatly, unlike you would expect a warm-blooded male to eat. He cut his steak into small pieces that easily fit inside of his mouth, and dabbed at his lips with a napkin when sauce dripped down. I tried to figure out how I was going to bring it up; I didn't want to nag, and certainly not while he's eating, but it had to be talked about. I waited until the last piece of lettuce disappeared inside of his mouth.

"So… Dad?" I started hesitantly, leaning my elbows on the table and clasping my hands. "It's the weekend."

He dropped his fork, leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest, studying me. I fidgeted. Why do parents have the power to make you feel guilty for a crime you didn't do? He was still looking at me. I schooled my features and my hand reached for my glasses; only, I had left them up in my room. _Damn._

He sighed, leaning back in his chair and rubbing his hands over his eyes. "I've thought a lot about it." He paused, glancing at me again before looking towards the rainy overcast outside. "I'm only agreeing under the terms that you don't buy anything this expensive for me again."

I sucked in a breath, a big smile on my face. Without another thought, I leaped up, crossed the table, and smothered Charlie with a hug. I decided that I liked hugs – well, hugging Charlie at least. Was showing somebody affection always like this? Warm and safe? "Thank you so much, Dad. You have no idea how much this means to me." And he didn't really; for me not having to face Renée's wrath, her harsh words and threats. "I know how hard this is for you; letting go of Renée, but…." Charlie flinched away from me; I said the wrong thing, again.

"Bells, I am over Renée," Charlie glanced up at me in a way that made me think otherwise.

"Dad, it's okay. You don't have to lie to me. I understand – believe me, I understand how persuasive she is, and can be."

"No. Isabella. Stop." He pushed away from me and paced behind his chair. "I only married your mother because I got her pregnant. I never loved her." His voice cracked. I panicked. I was messed up, wrong. I didn't have real friends, I was a freak. A socially inept sociopath. I was OCD and depressed. I had absolutely no experience in dealing with feelings – I didn't know how. And Charlie looked like he was about to start crying. My breathing picked up. _Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Please, Charlie. Please, don't. I don't know what to do with emotion. _I had a strange pressure on my chest. Everything was blurry, I shook my head. The floors weren't supposed to move like that, and why was it getting harder and harder to breathe? I was vaguely aware of a panting noise, sharp nails gripping at my shirt and pricking my chest. Someone was tugging at my hair, nails scraping the scalp. Suddenly, there was a pain in my knees, like I had banged them against something. _Oh, how did I get on the floor? _A scream. Warm liquid down my face. _STOP!_ _Please, please don't hurt me. Phil, I'm so sorry. So, so sorry. Please. Please. Please. Please. I can't breathe! I can't breathe! Dying. Dying. Dying. Dead. Dead. Dead. Why don't you love me? Why do you hate me? Please._

_Please._

_Please._

Then everything was black.

* * *

"Ms. Swan? Ms. Swan, can you hear me?"

I struggled to open my eyes. _Holy crap, why is it so bright here?_ "Where am I?" I asked, my voice rough and dry.

"The hospital." The same angelic voice answered back. I squinted at my sheets in confusion, am I dead? "How are you feeling, Ms. Swan?" I rolled my shoulders and winced in pain. _No, definitely not dead._ _ Did he say the hospital? _"Ms. Swan? Can you hear what I'm saying?"

I looked to my left. _Wow._

There was a doctor, scrutinizing me with concern, my mouth fell open. He was young, he was blond… and he was handsomer than any movie star I'd ever seen. He was pale, though, and tired looking, with circles under his golden eyes. From Charlie's description, this had to be Rosalie's father.

He smiled a perfect straight smile before saying, "welcome back into the world, Ms. Swan. Glad to have you on board _U.S.S. Living_." He grinned apologetically. "Sorry, dear. You're probably not too keen on humor right now." He lifted a hand to my head. "How are you feeling, sweetheart? Your father tells me you had quite the… attack."

"I'm fine," I said, although I wasn't so sure I was. What the hell happened? "Please, can you tell me what's going on?" He looked at me sadly.

"Chief Swan told me that you had a panic attack."

"Panic attack." I echoed dully.

"Yes, love," he moved a strand of my hair behind my ear, moving to sit beside me on the hospital bed. _Great._

"You're Dr. Cullen." I said, it was meant to be a question but my voice didn't quite catch on. He stuck out a hand.

"It's a pleasure, Ms. Swan." I took his hand, it was very cold, like Alice's hands.

"Please, call me Bella."

"As you wish. How are you feeling, really?" He asked, calling out my bluffs.

"Confused. What year is it?" He laughed, a deep bass laugh, and checked some things on his clipboard.

"Hi, Bella!" A voice came shouting through the doors. I slapped a hand to my forehead and groaned, unfortunately I would recognize that voice anywhere.

"Alice, I thought I told you and your siblings to wait in the lobby," Dr. Cullen frowned at his adoptive daughter.

"Yeah, yeah," Alice waved him off and turned to me. "You look like hell, Bells." She giggled at the unintentional rhyme. I removed my hands from my face. _He'd said 'siblings' as in all of them…_ _Oh, no!_ They were all there. Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, and even Edward, was standing against the back wall near the door with worried looks on their faces. I looked at the most beautiful one. Rosalie wasn't glaring, which was a pleasant surprise, but rather gnawing on her lip and tugging at her golden locks; shooting me concerned looks.

My attention was snapped away from the goddess when a new woman came through the doors with Charlie at her heels. I gawked at her, too. She had the same pale, beautiful features as the rest of them. Something about her heart-shaped face, her billows of soft, caramel- colored hair, reminded me of the ingénues of the silent-movie era. She was small, slender, yet less angular, more rounded than the others. Her golden eyes, the one she shared with her odd family, glimmered with the same worry.

"How are you, sweetheart?" She asked me, her voice soft and warm, as she came closer to the bed where the three of us resided. Charlie stood hesitantly in the doorway, with a look of muted raw pain on his face. I kicked my legs out from underneath the covers; I'll be damned to hell when I let anyone see me weak. I stood, ignoring the head rush that made my vision black out for a whole second.

"Hello, Mrs. Cullen." I said, throwing the smile I used to meet business men with. She saw right through my façade, she looked at me, bows furrowed up and opened her mouth, but closed it again. I took a look around the room. I should be freaking out; eight other people in a small enclosed room really wasn't the best idea for the mentally ill. But, for some reason beyond my comprehension, I felt at ease with the seven curious strangers and my father.

A small, dainty hand picked up mine from its fisted position against my leg, effectively drawing my attention back to Mrs. Cullen. "Honey, please call me Esme." She smiled brightly at me. I relaxed, their terms of endearment were heartwarming and very welcome. It made me feel like I was cared about.

"Hey, Bells. How do you feel?" Charlie stepped into the small room, the door finally closing behind him. I noticed something in his hands caught the light; they were my glasses. I breathed out, somehow he knew of my attachment, and thought the grab them for me. It made my eyes sting a little.

"Thank you so much, Dad." I nodded towards the glasses, trying to hide how my voice had caught at the end.

"You're avoiding the question." He grumped, frowning at the object in his hands. I breathed in again, trying to grasp my emotions. Suddenly, a large cloud of tranquility and warmth hit me, I was calm, I was happy, but at the same time it wasn't me.

"I honestly feel great, you guys." I shrugged, acknowledging the pain in my shoulder and my head. "Did I fall down?"

Charlie nodded. "Yeah, kid. You went down pretty hard."

Alice moved towards me, and guided me back to the bed. "Sit down, Bella. Your giving me an aneurism with all of your movements, you smart, beautiful, clumsy thing." For the first time in forever, I blushed. I wasn't well equipped with compliments.

"Uh… You're uh… Happy Birthday?" My mouth dropped open. Did that really just come out of my mouth? There was a still silence, and then laughter of deep basses and high, shimmering bells. One was distinctly my father. I blushed harder and hid my face in my hands. I saw a glimpse of Edward hiding his face in Emmett's shoulder, an expression on his face screaming that he was in pain.

I looked to Rosalie, the absolute light in this room. She was a thief and greedy, too, stealing my breath away and leaving me with none, Rosalie Hale was dazzling, stunningly pulchritudinous. Her head was thrown back, one hand gripping her hair, another on her stomach, bright citrine eyes twinkling. I literally sat there, with a stupid, ass, look on my face as she laughed at me, but, at that moment, I didn't care in the slightest.

Alice patted me on the back. "Oh, Bella, Bella. What are we to do with you?" I shrugged in response, and bit my lip. I looked around, anywhere but the resplendent faces. The clock seemed a worthy adversary, it read twelve O'clock A.M.

"It's late. I have school in the morning…" I murmured slightly, lips barely moving.

"Wouldn't you take a day off, Isabella?" Dr. Cullen inquired, he saw the expression on my face and grimaced. "Forgive me, I forgot who I was talking to." He thumbed through some pages. "Okay, sweetheart," he turned back to me, "you are free to go. But if you experience a light head, shakiness, anxiety, rushed heart, abnormal perspiration, or heavy breathing, call me, okay?" He handed me a slip of paper with neat flourished penmanship.

"Thank you very much, Dr. Cullen." I took the paper gratefully and smiled the best I could at him.

He rolled his eyes. "And for heaven's sake, Bella. Call me Carlisle."

* * *

That night, once Charlie and I got home, he refused to stop apologizing, like somehow it was his fault his daughter is a freak. I saw the kitchen carnage, chairs were knocked over and plates were smashed. I told Charlie that I'd pay for them, he told me not to worry about it, that it's okay, and he's sorry again for pushing me. He tucked me in too, like I was a little kid again, stroked my hair as I drifted to sleep whispering soft comforts, and promised me that he'll be back to check on me. Before he left my room, I vaguely remember saying something like how I was sorry that I was a freak and can't understand high emotion, I heard a choked sob before my door shut.

I didn't want to go to sleep. Nightmares plagued my mind more than the average teenager, but my mind didn't really seem to want to listen to me. I was lucky; my dreams that night were tasteless, dark, and blank. Only the occasional, psychologically, damaging voicing and memories. As promised Charlie – my knight in shining armor – shook me awake just as I was about to start screaming.

All morning the next day, I was dreading lunch, fearing Rosalie's bizarre glares – that I'd imagined her concerned looks and worried bites on her bottom lip. What must they think of me? A weak, scared little girl who was thrust into the real world too soon? Did they pity me, or was it actual concern? I'm not sure which idea I liked the least; I hated pity and I didn't want them wasting their worries on me.

But when I walked into the cafeteria with Jessica, not grabbing a lunch because food reminded me of last night – trying to keep my eyes from sweeping the place for Rosalie – I saw that all of them were watching me, Rosalie graced the barest hints of a smile on her breath taking face. I stood up straighter, taller, trying to show them that I was okay; last night didn't affect me. Alice just smiled and beckoned with her finger.

"Do they mean _you_?" Jessica asked in a tone that was almost insulting. I glanced behind me to make sure that she wasn't gesturing to somebody else before pointing at myself. Alice smiles, her body shaking with giggles that I couldn't hear, and nods to me again.

"Maybe she needs help with Biology homework," I garbled at Jessica before heading over the elusive table unsteadily.

I stood behind the open chair, trying not to be intimidated by the stares around the room. "Yes, Alice?" I asked, my throat still sore from last night's escapades.

She nodded to the seat I was behind. "Sit down, please." I did so immediately. Holding myself ramrod straight, and hardly breathing, I started to reach towards the top of my head. But a cold, white hand shot out, taking mine in her own. Alice stroked the back of my hand with her thumb, rubbing in soothing circles. "I meant to ask how you're doing, Bella."

I breathed. "I'm good. Thank you for asking." Alice gave me a look that clearly stated she didn't believe me in the slightest.

"Well, Bella. We didn't give proper introductions last night. Everybody this is Isabella, she likes to be called Bella. Bella, this is everybody. Say hello everybody." Alice commanded in a voice that would make the devil dance.

Jasper reached over first. "Howdy, darling." His adorable southern accent prominent, taking my hand from Alice's, he shook it. I nodded.

"Hello, Jasper."

Emmett was next. "Hey, Bellarina." He reached over, tugging me halfway across the table, hugging me in a bear like grip, before letting me go. Alice smacked his arm.

"Thank you, Emmett." I responded after I could get my breath back.

Edward was after, simply smiling at me. "It's very nice to meet you, finally, Bella."

I smiled back. "It's very nice to meet you too, Edward." A cool hand touched my shoulder, shooting a spark of electricity around my arm. I turned my attention to the gorgeous Aphrodite, who was smiling at me with her perfect, straight, white, glimmering teeth. Again – much like last night – she stole my breath away, leaving me gasping and staring after her. Her smile widened.

"Hello, Isabella." Her voice was absolutely perfect, soft and melodic. Impossibly heart-stopping. A beat. Then two. And finally, I got my brain working again.

"H-hello, R-R-Rosalie. It's a pleasure to meet you." The hand on my arm dropped, and I missed the cool touch immediately.

"Dammit, you guys! I told you she likes to be called Bella. Is Edward and Jasper the only ones who listens to me in this family?" Alice exclaimed, throwing her hands into the air with frustration. Emmett just merely boomed out a laugh, and Rosalie parted her perfect lips again.

"My apologies, then, Bella." I shivered again at my name falling from her lips.

"No problem, thank you Rosalie." I told her, not wanting her to feel bad about anything so trivial, and I really didn't mind as long as she said it.

"If I am to call you Bella, then you must call me Rose, okay?" She requested, rolling her eyes in mock annoyance.

I grinned. "Okay, Rose." Did she notice the way I said it as a caress?

"Hey, Bells. Where's your food?" Alice interjected my staring parade, breaking her own name rule in the process.

"Oh, I'm not very hungry. I had a large breakfast."

"You're too skinny, Bella. You need to start eating more." She harrumphed back at me.

"Well – the pot calls the kettle black, Alice. It's not like you guys ever eat." I frowned at them all. Yet they didn't look sick, or even starved. Actually they looked flushed, it had started snowing outside recently and their hair was slightly damp from the snow. The dark circles underneath their eyes were less prominent and their gold eyes were bright and happy.

Emmett laughed, Edward grinned, Jasper shook his head, and Alice and Rosalie grinned at me.

"Yeah, well, you'll figure it out soon enough. The bell is going to ring—" she said, and the bell rang suddenly. I started and looked around; children were starting to get up to leave. I stood with the others. "Bella? Sit with us from now on please? I don't like Jessica, or Mike for that matter. He looks like he wants to hump your leg," Alice pleaded, and honestly, how would you say no to that face?

"You don't like anyone." I grumbled under my breath but nodded the same.

"Sure we do, we all like you." Alice grinned and squeezed my hand before locking hands with Jasper and walking towards the west doors, with Emmett and Edward in front of them.

"Shall we?" Rosalie stood near my side, gesturing to the east doors.

"Oh, Rosalie. You don't have to walk me to class, I have Italian and I know that you don't particularly like—"

"I don't dislike you, Bella." She cut me off

"But, you glar—"

"I glared only because I'm trying to protect my family. At first it was because I didn't know what was so interesting about you – now I do – and last week it was because Alice and the others had taken to you. Over this week though – I am not sure what changed, but something did. And trust me when I say that the emotions I fell for you are the complete opposite of hatred or dislike." Her voice was pleading, her golden eyes searching my face for a hint of forgiveness.

_Protect them from what?_ I wanted to ask, but I had the feeling that she'd would tell me that I'd have to figure it out, like Alice did. So instead I smiled at her, then frowned. "But, Rose, you don't have Italian with me." I would have noticed the blonde goddess in that small classroom.

We headed out of the cafeteria and down the carpeted hallways. "Yes, well, I do now. I changed only yesterday; Gym was getting tedious, and Esme thought it'd be best if I brushed up my Italian." She paused, stopping to let students pass as she looked at me, "and because I heard you had that class as well." I blushed. She smiled. "That's too adorable, you know." She commented, walking inside the heated room.

"It's embarrassing," I said back, she shook her beautiful head in disagreement.

"Alice made the family familiarize ourselves with you; your biography said that you speak fourteen different languages; Italian is one of them."

"Easy A. I sit back by the wall, if you'd like to join me." It was like our situations switched, I was the confident one and she, impossibly, was the uncertain one. I watched in awe as she bit her lip glancing at me from underneath her eyelashes. A heat shot down and coiled in my lower stomach, leaving me vaguely frustrated. _What _was_ that? _

"Are you sure? Nobody sits with you?" She asked her voice small. I watched with sick delight as her tongue shot out to lick her lips. I wondered what they tasted like.

"Uh… no. Nobody sits with me." I said, hoping that she'd do it again. Only it occurred to me that somebody did sit next to me; Jessica. Oh, well. Her other friend, Lauren, I think, is in this class too. I shook my head, trying to clear from a Rosalie fog, and lead the way.

She moved with a stalking grace, one you'd see on a snow leopard. I may or may have not glanced at her jean clad ass as she walked in front of me. _It's a nice ass_. I followed her.

Jessica walked in, and narrowed her eyes at Rosalie and I. I was afraid that she was about to come over here and start an argument with Rosalie. Then, a low growl like sound came from said person. Jessica's eyes widened and she quickly scrambled to another seat.

"Did you just _growl_?" I asked the blonde beside me. She responded by taking my hand off of the table and stroked it softly. Once. Twice. Before letting it drop on my lap softly.

"You're so _warm_," was her breathy sigh.

I wanted to ask her what the hell that meant. But the teacher started his lectures.

It was adorable; watching Rosalie growl softly under her breath and correct the teacher's pronunciation. Her brows were furrowed in the cutest way, my fingers itched to smooth them out – to take her bottom lip from her teeth.

"Okay, kids. What's the Italian word for 'Thorn'? Isabella you should now this one." The teacher, Mr. Gundance asked me.

"Spina," I called back without taking my eyes off of Rosalie, her smile grew.

After class, Rosalie and I parted our separate ways. In Biology, Alice and I chatted and giggled over the lab assignment, she pulled out her phone at one point.

"Rosalie asked if it would be alright if she could accompany you to your car. I'll tell her yes obviously." She murmured, typing sporadically at her phone. I laughed, wondering how she knew my answer, or if I were more obvious than I thought.

True to her word Rosalie was waiting outside the classroom for me.

"Hello," I bounded up to her.

"Hello, Bella." She responded. "How was Biology?"

"Good, I have it with Alice. It'll never be boring." She nodded like she knew what I was talking about. _Of course she does, she lives with her, stupid!_ "What class did you just get out of?" I asked.

"English, with Mr. Mason." She grinned down at me.

"How was that?" I wondered

"Good, too. Although I wish he'd stop talking about how well thorns and roses suit each other. I already know that." My heart sped up, considerably. _You know, if she married you, her name would literally be Rose Thorn. Wait, what? Creepy much, Bella? Are you flying the rainbow flag now? _That's a thought – not the creepy idea about marriage, but the one about my sexual orientation. Am I gay? I snuck a look at Rosalie's face. Yep. _That's it? That's my coming out of the closet experience?_ I was somewhat disappointed, wasn't there supposed to be angst and the fear of parents finding out? Where was the drama and self-loathing? _Well, you hate yourself already, and it is dramatic because you have to hide it from Renée. But, hey! Charlie won't care, he even says he prefers it. _I'll also have to tell Charlie when he gets home, I promised I would. 

We arrived out to my car, disappointment flooded me. "I'll see you tomorrow, right Rose?" I asked, my voice boarding pathetic desperation. She tilted her head to the side, studying me. Then she stepped forward and took my hand in her cool ones.

"Yes, Isabella Swan- Spina, yes you will. I promise."

No force in the world could have wiped off the goofy grin that graced my face that night. Nothing.

* * *

**Okay so, hi! I was wondering if I should do another character Point of View, should I? Maybe Rosalie, or just keep it Bella? If so, please tell me!**


	3. Deny and Realize

**A.N. Hello, guys! A lot of you great, fantastic, readers have requested the Rosalie POV. I agree too, that I owe you an explanation for Rosalie's sudden feeling change. They won't become couples immediately, they'll be friends for a while before anything really kicks up. I'm doing this because I feel like this story is going to fast anyway, but they will, I repeat, WILL end up together. I swear. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, SM does. If I did, there would be no such things as love triangles; because they're stupid.**

* * *

**_" Don't try to follow me_**

**_I would hold you down if I could_**

**_Make you the Enemy_**

**_I would let you down" _****Andrew Belle - The Enemy **

_Rosalie_

Today the new girl arrived to Forks. As predicted the girls gushed and the boys – even some girls, too – lusted. It didn't help the fact that she was a rich CEO at only seventeen years old. She was a shiny new toy, a trophy. _But what was so special about her?_ She moved awkwardly, talked like she was fifty years old at times. She fidgeted with her hands a lot, bit her lips too much. She was a nervous creature, sending longing looks towards the doors, like maybe she wanted to escape from a cafeteria full of hormonal teenagers. She also had an odd little quirk, she wore glasses, even in sunless Forks, Washington. Maybe she was trying for an angle.

Not that I was paying attention, I just merely heard regular, fresh of the mill Forks' gossip. Sort of.

"Who are _they?_" A quiet, clear, low voice asked from across the room. Ah, so she finally noticed the mysterious Cullen and Hale 'twins'.

Edward flipped his penny head over to the gossip queen herself, Ms. Jessica Stanley. She must have thought his name.

"The new girl is about to get the load down of the Cullens." Alice said, "What's she thinking, Eddie?" Edward didn't react, which surprised me, generally Edward threw a little bitch fit when someone – besides Emmett, in the bedroom – called him anything other than his name.

He stared at her longer than he should have. "I can't read her mind." He mumbled, looking towards the table as if ashamed. What?

I snapped my head towards her. Great, just more trouble. We might even have to leave town for this stupid human's selfishness.

I hadn't looked at her before; I just didn't care. But, now that I looked, I could almost see where people were coming from, placing her in the spotlight.

She was attractive, for a human, anyway. Her face, symmetrically appealing. She had all of the youthful qualities that made her alluring; straight dark brown hair – mahogany, actually – with natural red highlights, the hair hit her waist before ending. She was fair skinned, almost as pale as us. It set off her pinkish red lips. Her features straight, aristocratic; her nose – which carried a splattering of freckles, her jawline, and her darker eyebrows. Her cheekbones were high and prominent. She was slim, although she was too skinny to be healthy. Her eyes were a deep brown hazel, the green appearing around her iris. Around her eyes were black, long, thick, feathery eyelashes. She didn't have a trace of makeup anywhere on her. Her bottom lip disappeared behind snowy white teeth.

"Alice, is she a danger to us?" I asked after turning around. I stopped tapping out the haunting melody and looked to the physic. Her face was glazed over, eyes blank and staring. She blinked once, breaking out of her trance.

"Ah! I can't see that," she grumbled in frustration.

"We'll have to play it carefully then, Jasper you'll have to tell us if her feelings changes or something." I didn't want to have to move. Forks – as small as it is – is safe for us; we can go out much more than we could in any other state or country. Jasper nodded, looking strained. He was getting better with his control, but we all knew that he was being tortured; he was doing very well, it's been a week since we last hunted.

I felt two holes on the side of my head, like I was being watched. I turned my head to see the Spina business girl watching me. I snarled at her and threw on the 'Ice Queen' glare. The girl just gave me a curious look back, like she didn't know the reason I was treating her meanly, or as if I had an answer to her impossible question. It pissed me off.

"And Elsa returns!" Emmett snickered. I glared at him, too. It was a common joke in the family, I was blonde and icy, and somehow that qualified me as the Snow Queen from the Disney movie Frozen.

To be fair, I had a couple pictures of me as a human. Alice bought this program that added color to older photos based on shade; it was accurate. It easily showed my platinum blonde hair and blue eyes, it didn't help that I was paler than normal back then, either.

My hair wasn't platinum anymore; the vampirism changes that. And I have the accustomed golden eyes from the 'vegetarian diet' that we based ourselves on. I looked glorious in red, too. Edward growled at me.

_What? Sad that you didn't look as good as me when you went, drinking their blood down? Or is the memory of red eyes a delicate subject for you, Dracula? _

"Rosalie!" Edward slobbered. I smirked, he pissed me off spectacularly this morning. He deserved this.

_Or are you upset because you couldn't handle the bloodlust? I killed those five people – sorry, seven, I always forget the guards – as a new born. I didn't spill their blood. Not. One. Drop._

Edward snapped up, preparing for a fight. Gosh, he was such a damn Drama Queen. He really did deserve it though. We all stood fluidly to cover up his slip of moving too fast.

"Damn, you guys couldn't give it a break, could you?" Alice sighed once we were outside the cafeteria. I didn't blame her, Edward was an asshole when he was bitchy. "Edward, if you don't stop growling at Rosalie I swear I will hitch kick you in your face. Got it? No, seriously, knock it off, you deserved it after this morning."

"What did he do?" Emmett asked, he was aware of Edward's bitch phase, but with them being mated to each other, he naturally wanted to protect Edward. Everybody except for dick-butt looked at me. I turned away.

"Rosie?"

"He made some crack about how I was a rug-muncher, but who can blame me for my sexuality change?" There was an angry, almost awkward pause.

"…Rosalie, I know that isn't all."

"Fine, Jasper. He also informed me that I would never find my mate because I'm too messed up. He said that I should enjoy the loneliness." I finished off sadly, I knew it was true. I've killed, I've lied, I'm damaged goods; who could ever learn to love a beast like me?

"Why is everybody assuming that I'm the bad guy here?" Edward yelled, bounding around on us. "Maybe she did something too!"

Alice looked at him. "Even if she did Edward, you had no right." She continued, getting louder. "How dare you! Even if for a second—"

"Alice, it's no big deal. I'm over it." I consoled her, bringing her little, stiff body to mine in a hug. I watched as Emmett frowned at Edward.

"Wait until Esme hears about this."

The bell had rang just a second ago, and already students were piling the halls.

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. A large swarm of people came out of the cafeteria all at once; the new girl at the front, walking fast. Almost like she was trying to get away from her groupies. Edward sniffed. Edward lunged.

Emmett caught his growling mate and slammed him up against the lockers; apparently not caring if it left a dent. We all stood, stunned. Edward never lost control like that; he was up there with Carlisle and me for blood control. Jasper snapped out of his daze, working quickly to sedate the vampire. Edward slumped against Emmett, his snarl slipping off of his face, his eyes closing with Jasper's bliss wave.

Without a second to spare, Emmett raced off to the doors that led outside. Jasper followed, shouting something to us about going to our classes.

Yeah, right. No way fuckerdoodledees.

Especially because I have Gym next period. We've been here for two years now, you'd think that they would have learned that you don't, under any circumstances, put a Cullen or a damned Hale in Gym class. Alice rolled her eyes at me, seeing that I wasn't going to go to class.

"You go see if Bubba's okay. I, however, have to go to class. We're doing a lab today."

So, only naturally – being the best, most wonderful, most beautiful, and most caring sister that I am – I followed them out into the rain. _The things we do for that poop-hole stuffer._

Edward had drove his silver Volvo to school today; so that's where the men's group was. Jasper had his arms atop the car, watching the mated pair silently. The said pair had their arms wrapped around each other. Edward was sobbing.

"I'm so sorry guys. It's all my fault. If I had just been strong enough, better, none of this would have happened!" He cried out dramatically, clutching himself to Emmett. I sighed. Sure, I thought Edward was a little bitch forever stuck on his period, but he was still my brother – I loved him, even if I didn't like him.

Edward always blamed himself. At first I thought he did it for attention, but it's clear that he really did blame himself. I suppose that's why they make such a good couple; Emmett brings him out of his self-hatred and Edward calms Emmett down. Not to mention that they unconditionally love one-another.

Edward was still crying non-existent tears down his face. I turned to Jasper.

"Girl," Jasper said in his adorable southern drawl, "didn't I tell you to get to class?"

I looked at him, and shook my head. "Nope. No. I don't think that came out of your mouth, Jasper." I was going to have to play it dumb. "Are you feeling okay?" I said, walking over on my tiptoes to press my hand to Jasper's forehead. "You feel vampire cold, Jazz." He rolled his eyes. "So what do you think it is?" I asked him in a more serious tone. "Edward's never lost control like this, he is almost as good as Carlisle."

"Well, I have a theory." Jasper said, and paused. Like he didn't feel inclined to go on.

"What's your theory, Cowboy?" I hissed.

"I was on the telephone with Peter a couple of days ago. He said that Charlotte and him won't be able to come up. Something about how Charlotte had slipped accidently in a crowd full of people. She told him that she couldn't help it, that it was just too strong, that one person. He did some research in Italy and found the term 'La tua Cantante'. He told me that it was almost impossible to resist the call of your singer – or that's what he read, at least." Wow. I had heard of it, of course. But until now, I only thought it was a myth.

"Edward is alright now?"

"He can't smell her that well anymore. That, and, I'm taking as much blood lust away from him as I'm able to."

"Thank you, Jasper." I sighed. Maybe, if we were careful, we could get over this unfortunate milestone.

Students were walking out into the parking lot. I threw my head back. I hated when we did it; got so caught up that we didn't notice the time flying by. Another thing to hate about being a vampire. Alice ran out of class with the other humans.

"Is Charlotte and Peter alright, then?" Alice asked, having heard what Jasper and I were talking about always concerned about the present and everything else. In that perspective; she was very much like our dear, old, Carlisle Cullen.

Jasper nodded to his Alice. "Yes, darling. They got out of there before anybody could see their faces." He seemed calm, apathetic, towards the situation of Peter and Charlotte. But you could tell by the way his accent deepened and how is brows furrowed in, that he was very, very, concerned about his old travel companions. Alice knew though, Alice _always_ knew. She walked up to her love and hugged him tight.

It was adorable, watching them. They were the second cutest couple in the Cullen household, above them was Carlisle and Esme. I felt the familiar overload of cuteness, but, besides that, there was a hint of … bitterness? Jasper, being the empath, turned to look at me.

It was bad. I hated the look on his face. It was worse that I felt like sobbing there and then. His soft, scarred, face held a complete look of understanding. It pissed me off to no end, how is it fair that he understood and accepted my emotions? When I didn't understand them and sure as hell didn't accept them.

I huffed and turned to look at the nearly deserted parking lot. Jasper and I would definitely be having a talk later.

Just then, the Spina girl came out. Hurrying in all of her elegance and incredibly long legs. I glared at her. I hated that girl with a new-found passion. I despised her very existence. It was all her fault, that Edward was like this, all out of control and monstrous.

"We could kill her," I murmured softly to Emmett, who came up to my side, staring at the girl like everybody else. "I won't be gruesome about it, sneak into her room and smack her head against something. I could make it look like she slipped and fell." Alice gasped and growled.

"Don't you dare, Rosalie Hale! Isabella is my friend, do you understand me? Mine."

I whirled around on her. "She is ripping this family apart, Alice! Look what's she done to Edward! We will have to move if he can't control it."

She came up into my face. Well, as much as she could with her four feet and ten inch height. "_I_ _won't_ _let_ _you._" She hissed into my face. The realization slapped me, hard. Alice, even only spending fifty-four minutes in a classroom with her – she had to have had a classroom with her, or she wouldn't be acting so irresponsible – _loved_ this inconsequential human. I realized, too, with startling clarity, that if we harmed the girl Alice would leave. And probably never come back home.

I choked, and Alice's gaze softened. She understood that I lived for my family, that I lived to protect them, save them. They are my world. And this girl, this beautiful, selfish girl, could take away my world. Away my sunshine. My only sunshine.

I turned around to glare at the girl. I would not accept her. I would not accept her… The new kid turned around, her gaze locking on me the longest, before scanning the rest of our faces. Her eyebrows furrowed up, and she opened her mouth slightly. She looked almost as if she wanted to step over here and ask what was wrong. My glare intensified, her brows drew together. Alice frowned at me, before turning to the girl and waved enthusiastically.

Something lit in her eyes, and she pulled her glasses over them – even though it was freaking dark outside – and waved back with her long fingers. She got in her car and peeled out of the lot.

"Rosalie, come with me please." Jasper asked, gesturing to the school back woods. Looks like I was getting that talk after all.

I took off running, letting all of my hate, pain, anger, and confusion spur me on, running to heaven knows where. I loved running, everything flew past you at a gorgeous rate. Brilliant greens, sunlight yellows and occasional vermillion reds, everything was just stunning.

I stopped at some point, I don't know how long or where we're at, but I knew that the perpetual white stuff sticking to the ground was snow. Jasper was one step behind me. Edward was the fastest in the family; I was second.

"It was jealousy," Jasper said, pulling me into a hug. I nodded against his firm chest. I knew that, I had felt it once or twice in my human life with Vera and her little Henry. But I didn't know why! I wasn't jealous of Jasper or Alice, I didn't want either of them like that.

"Why though?" My own voice was absolutely weak. I hated that, too.

"When I was traveling with Peter and Charlotte, sometimes they would hold hands and kiss. I felt the same thing you did; jealousy. But it wasn't for him or her, it was for both of them; for what they had. I wanted that. I wanted what they had so much it hurt." He paused to stroke my hair. "Do you understand what I mean, Rose?"

Yeah. I did.

Even if I really fucking hated it.

* * *

This past week had been painful. The freaking Swan-Spina girl really, really, pissed me off. I hated her.

It didn't help that Alice loved her; so did Emmett and Jasper and Carlisle and Esme. Fan-fucking-tastic. Edward ran to Denali, Alaska with his tail tucked between his legs. He hasn't been back for four days.

And that was probably good, considering that he wants to suck her dry.

We were in lunch right now; the four of us. I was glaring at the stupid girl's perfect face, with her adorable voice, and her stupidly sexy lips. I hated her so much.

"She's doing it again!" Jasper hissed, rubbing at his temples.

"What is she doing, Jasper?" I asked in disdain, instead I was focused on how that stupid slut, Jessica Stanley, was staring at the girl's breast, and how she licked her lips when the girl wet her own. Jessica Stanley was trying to get into that girl's pants. Whore. She just laughed at something the Spina girl said. **_Who_**_ the fuck does she think she is? Laughing at something __**she**__ said? Bitch better watch her skanky ass._

"That glasses trick. It's like she shuts off her emotions when she puts them on. It's beyond frustrating." _Yeah, yeah. But who cares about glasses? Instead, I think we should focus on how that dyke was rubbing her hand against the poor girl's leg! WHAT THE FUCK?! Did she just trip against the Swan girl to grope her boobs? Bitch better hold me back! _I snarled at her, looking around to throw something at her fake, nose jobbed, face.

"Rosalie, I wouldn't recommend that. You actually impale Jessica's head with the lunch tray." Alice soothed, bringing the arm down that held the tray, and rubbed her hand up and down it. I growled louder.

"I know, Alice! That's why I'm fucking throwing it!" Everybody's eyes widened. I rarely used expletives, I thought it was incredibly immature and childish. But here I was, using them because the girl made me. I growled again,

Jessica was seriously begging to die.

* * *

Bella. Bella. Bella. Bella. Bella. Isabella Spina. Isabella Swan. Bella. Bella. My Bella. _MINE_!

My thoughts stopped my pacing. My Bella? Where did that come from?

I hated that girl with a passion. A severe, ripping, inferno.

Didn't I?

Three rasps on the door was all it took to rip my thoughts away from me. I sniffed; Edward. When did he get back? "Hey, Rose. Can I come in?"

"I don't know. Can you?" I faced the window away from the door as I said this. The door opened. The door closed. A hand on my shoulder.

"I want to apologize. I shouldn't have said what I said to you. I was angry, and frustrated. I hadn't seen Emmett all day that day, you see, I needed to vent; and you were there." He explained, bringing his arms around to my front in a hug. I nodded and leaned against him.

"Okay," It was breaking, a voice that held too violently. It matched my thoughts, the hole that was paced into the carpet. It matched the colors that were more vibrant than they were before, it matched my ache to cry. It matched my shaking body; its own punishment for feeling too harshly. It matched my confusion and anger, my sadness and pain, my loneliness and depression. Everything. Everything was linked to her, what I need and what I despise.

"I can help, sis. Only of you'd let me."

"Tell me. Tell me why I can't get her off of my mind; why I'm not sure I hate her, or if I ever have hated her. Tell me, Edward. I'm falling apart – and… I don't have enough stiches to put me back together. Not without her." I rambled on. On one hand I wanted him to tell me what was wrong with me, but on the other, I didn't want to know; because I'm pretty sure I won't like it.

"You love her." A pause. A beat. A breath. A thought. A scream. Pain.

"No!"

"Rosalie—"

"No, no. I can't. I can't. She dangerous. She is in danger from us. Gosh, I can't love her. I can't do this to Esme, to Carlisle, to Alice and Jasper, to you and Emmett. I can't."

"Rosal—" He started.

"No! Edward. I can't do that. No, no." I said, on the verge of a breakdown. Edward turned me around and shook my shoulders, hard.

"Rosalie. Listen to me. You don't love her yet; I said it as a future tense, almost." He finished smiling at me guiltily.

"What?" I was startled, bemused even. What?

"You don't love her yet."

"What do you mean?" I asked, I was still not getting it. Edward threw his head back and groaned.

"You. Don't. Love. Her. Yet." He repeated to me slowly, as if I were a little child. _Oh_.

"I see." I put a finger to my lips and frowned. "How long do I have before it infects me?" This time Edward laughed.

"I don't know, really. I suppose I give it a week or a month, max." He ran a hand through his crazy hair. I heard little footsteps and my door slamming open. Alice.

"Rosalie! Get your damned coat on now!" Alice screamed, backing me up further into my room, while Edward had taken off downstairs in a hurry.

"What? Why? What's happening?" I asked, but still grabbed my coat anyway.

"Bella's in the hospital!"

I never ran as fast as I did that night.

* * *

We made it to Forks' hospital in record time; it probably helped that I was going over one-hundred miles per hour.

I didn't wait for the car to stop before I jumped out and ran into the warm building. I didn't even stop for Alice's pleas, all that mattered to me right now was Isabella's safety; I was going to make sure that she was safe.

"Rosalie! Wait! She's not even awake yet," Alice came up behind me and wrapped her thin arms around my waist. It made me angry; who was she to keep me from her? Who gave her the right? "Shush, Rosalie, shush, she'll wake up in two minutes. Two minutes, I promise."

The west doors opened and Carlisle came through, he turned to us immediately with a look of shock on his face. "Girls? What are you doing here? It's…." He trailed off to check his wristwatch, "11:50."

"Carlisle, your patient is Isabella Spina." His eyes widened at what Alice had told him. "We'll all be coming in once she wakes up. You'll have to play it off so she doesn't freak out."

He nodded. "Alright girls. Have a seat in my office, please, until Ms. Swan wakes up." Carlisle pointed toward a closed door to the right of us. I shifted. There was nothing in the world that I wanted more than just to be with her; to keep her safe. But I didn't want her to freak out, like Alice said she would.

So, very reluctantly, I went to sit in his office.

I had seen it hundreds of times, but every time, I'm stunned at Esme's work, it was warm and bright; the look of the nineteenth century mixed with modern times. Esme comes in every so often; to check on the naughty nurses and Carlisle – not that she doesn't _trust _him. But, even then, she generally comes in every so often. That's why I was confused when I heard the hospital doors open and when Esme's scent filled the air.

"Hello, beauties." Esme said, opening up the door and crossing the threshold to hug Alice and I.

"Hello, Esme." Alice responded, hugging Esme tighter, lifting our pseudo mother off of the ground.

"Esme, what are you doing here?" I asked, hugging her back when she moved onto me.

"Why, I came to see the person who has cause your latest existential crisis, dear." Esme, innocently said, wide eyes blinking at me. I frowned at her while Alice giggled.

"Oh! Isabella is awake." Alice blinked twice. But, I was already out in the hall, following Bella's scent like some rabid dog. Or like those nasty La Push wolves. I vaguely heard Emmett, Edward, Jasper, Esme, and Alice following after me.

"Confused. What year is it?" Her sweet, soft voice came through the door. Thank God, she's alright! I opened up the door, and Alice shot in front of me, greeting her first. I growled.

"She doesn't think you like her." Alice murmured, too softly for any human to hear. I flinched because that did sting. A lot.

I went to stand with the others and the door wall, watching with amusement as what Carlisle said registered to her brain.

Esme wasn't in the room with us. I think she may have went to go get her father, Charlie, the Chief of Police.

Isabella's beautiful hazel eyes scanned us in alarm. Her gaze once again lingering on me, this time with a surprised look on her face. _Is she really alright though? I heard Carlisle say that she had a panic attack, what the hell could have caused that? _

Esme came in then, with the human's father in tow. Esme stopped, looking at the girl. Then she smiled slightly and stepped forward to take her hands. I sighed, I was glad that Esme accepted her, as well as Carlisle. I shook my head, this was Esme we were talking about; of course she accepted her.

Everybody was asking how she was and I could tell it irritated her. I would have spoken to her, walked up and took her hand in my own. But, I was too busy trying to fight the urge to snatch her up, throw her against the wall and kiss the living daylights out of her until she was hot and sweaty, until her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she panted. I would kiss her, touch her, until she begged for me. And I would give myself to her; no questions asked.

"Rosalie. Focus!" Edward hissed at me from his position in Emmett's shoulder, he must have been hurting.

"Right, right." I whispered back to him. "I got it." Maybe, at school, I could drag her into the Janitor's closet, pin her arms above her head as she whimpered from need. I would kiss down her pale neck, feeling the blood thump harshly under her skin. I would lick languidly, tease her sinfully. I would rip off her—

"Rosalie! Please!" Jasper and Edward whispered simultaneously.

"Sorry! I can't help it," I hissed back. "Not when she looks like that!"

"Uh… You're uh… Happy birthday?" A voice, sexy voice said. I bit down on my lip, hard enough to draw blood – if I had any – and crossed my legs; trying to ease the ache that suddenly appeared between them. I'm such a creepy pervert. I laughed though, along with the others. Not because I heard the joke or whatever Alice had done to embarrass her; but I laughed a relieved laugh. Isabella was okay. Isabella, Bella, my Bella was going to be okay.

* * *

Bella and her father left. I was unhappy that she would be attending school tomorrow. Not that I didn't want to see her – I did, immensely so – but because I was worried about her mental and physical state of body and mind.

"Oh, my goodness. I can see where you coming from Rosalie, dear. Bella is absolutely adorable. Gosh, she is so cute." Esme breathed, a hand over her chest while she looked where Isabella had just left the room. I smiled, I was proud of her, for some weird reason.

"Yes, she is cute all right." Alice grinned, turning to look at me. "But according to Rosalie, Bella is completely fuck-able." I ducked my head in embarrassment; my fantasies were getting out of hand if Alice actually saw them happening.

"Alice! Rosalie!" Esme admonished, though she was unsure who to scold.

"I apologize, Esme. I won't and wouldn't have done anything to Isabella, believe me." My tone darkened. "It was just a passing thought." One that made it happen in Alice's visions.

"Must have been some passing thought, Rosa." Emmett grinned at my annoyance towards my altered name. "I'll be getting some tonight." He added with a wink toward Edward.

"Speaking of, Edward. You said a week minimum. Not a freaking hour!"

* * *

**Hello, again. I was considering adding another fanfiction. It would be Bellice (Bella x Alice). Basically, it would be about how Bella escaped from a laboratory in Phoenix, where they experimented on her, turning her into an indestructible, super spy, killing machine. I don't know right now though, I haven't got the plot all worked out yet, you see. I'm sorry if you guys hate that I ship Bella and Alice, I honestly ship Bella with everyone besides Edward or Jacob, I'll probably need to be convinced, though, if it's like Carlisle and Bella. Sorry! I'm rambling! Thank you guys so, so, so, much for everything that you are doing. I love you!**


	4. Attacks and Confessions

**A.N. So, Hi guys. What has it been? Three weeks or so? I'm so, so, so, so, sorry. I really don't have an excuse, other than catching up on my fanfiction reading, and scoping out Tumblr. I mean, have you guys ever heard of Joniss, Jori, Clovniss, and Malice? Seriously, it's ruining my life. **

**This chapter is shorter, like two thousand words shorter than normal, because it's a filler chapter. Boring, really boring. I'm so sorry. The next chapter will be so much longer and more exciting, I swear. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, SM does. If I did the Cullens would have a pet.**

* * *

When I woke up the next morning, I could tell it was going to be one of _those_ days. I'm not sure if it was the dark light that spilled into my room, or if it was that I had suppressed it long enough, but I knew, I _knew_ it was going to be one of the uncontrollable days.

My Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder wasn't life threatening. But it was controlling. My doctor back in Phoenix had told me that I had a rare case; it only comes up when something sparks a buried memory of my traumatic past, or when my depression rears its ugly head. Of course, the doctor didn't know of my past, I figured out the causes myself. But he did tell me that my OCD is not as bad as it could be. It was implied that it wasn't so bad because I already had life altering mental issues going on already – perhaps my brain couldn't take all of the faults. I got the message as clear as if he had said it, though. Because really, he didn't need to, I knew I was a screw up. I'm just glad that Renée made him sign a contract, Spina industries doesn't need to know that a mentally ill, seventeen year old heir will run the business.

The first thing my new OCD eyes noticed immediately, was that nothing in my room was even, or equally placed. My desk wasn't exactly in the middle of the back wall and my curtains were crooked against the window. I also noticed that my wardrobe drawers were mismatched. Crap on toast.

I threw my legs out of bed and immediately stumbled into the ground. Generally, this doesn't happen. Rolling Stones said I was the epitome of grace and beauty – not that I believe it, but it was nice to say anyways. The point is; I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, tables and chairs are bullies, and the walls just move in my way.

"Bells?" I hear Charlie call from downstairs. I grimace and look around my room. Will the OCD monster let me talk to my father and go the school before fixing this? Or will I have to miss school today in order to fix everything? _No! Rosalie is at school, remember? You won't get to see her if you stay home and clean. She doesn't hate you anymore. She said that you would see her today. _I think that convinced it. The growling subsided and its ugly head ducked down back into the holes of oblivion. I flipped onto my back and groaned from relief. It was strange that I had gotten hold of _her_ reins, it never happened before.

It was becoming clearer and clearer that Rosalie Hale meant something more to me than a friend. And I was scared at how fast this feeling was going. It needed to stop, I'm taking risks just being friends with the Cullens and the Hales, and I didn't need more messy feelings. Besides, I didn't know anything about her, other than her being the most gorgeous creature in the universe and that she really didn't hate me. Oh! And she preferred to be called Rose, even though I hadn't been doing a good job of that.

No, I needed to work on Spina industries. No feelings, other than friends, and no relationships – even if the teenage Aphrodite wanted to start one with you. _Wow, maybe your OCD just got worse, you keep obsessing over her, you shallow, shallow creature. It's pitiful, really, how consumed you are. Starved for contact, Bella? Hmm? _

"Shut up," I scolded myself.

_I mean, how egotistical are you? Thinking that she could possibly like you? Just because you're rich? You know better than that, she'll run away or hurt you like Renée and Phil did. You'd do something stupid and tell her you have issues. She'll hate you. _

"No she won't! She's not like that! Rosalie's not like that!" I whispered to myself.

"Bella? Are you okay?" I think Charlie asked as he knocked on the door. _Get yourself together!_

"Oh, yeah, Dad. I'm just being silly." I said nonchalantly, as if my subconscious hadn't really just attacked me, and as if I wasn't actually talking to myself. I got up to open the door. Charlie was standing on the other side with an expression displaying his worries.

"Oh, well if you're sure…." He trailed off, and clearly he wasn't sure I was sure. So, I smiled brightly at him,

"Yeah, Dad. I'm good, spiff and dandy and all," I winked at him, moving past his body to go downstairs, and straightened pictures so they aligned with the cracks as well as being straight. I heard him follow behind me.

"Bells?" He asked, obviously confused as to why I was taking time to tidy things up.

"Sorry, Dad. OCD, remember?"

"It hasn't come up before," he murmured quietly, I decided not to respond.

I walked into the kitchen, again messing with things so that they were symmetrical and aligned with the edges of the counters. "So, Dad, the offer to tell you anything is still open, right?" I questioned without looking at him.

"Yes, of course,"

I faced him then, propping my hip on the counter and placing on hand on my hip and the other in my hair to hold it back. "Well, you know the Cullens, right?"

He looked baffled. "Yes."

I blushed and shifted my weight. "Well, there is this girl, sort of. She's … pretty. Super pretty… you know?" Wow, this wasn't coming out right at all.

A look of comprehension dawned on his face. "Oh… and you—"

"Yeah"

We stared at each other for a few minutes. Well, actually, Charlie stared at my blush and embarrassment, I stared at the growing smile on his face.

"Who's the lucky girl, then?" He crossed his arms and leaned against the counter, nearly mirroring my position.

"Not hardly lucky, Dad." I told him, looking at the microwave screen as I spoke. "And her name is Rosalie Hale."

Cue look of confusion, again. "The small, black haired one?"

I laughed. "No! Not Alice! The blonde one." The gorgeous one. The goddess like one. Aphrodite.

"Oh? Really? That's – wow. That's really. Wow, Bells. You sure know how to pick them." He stumbled out. Looking impressed, almost. "So, are you two dating, then?"

"No, Dad," I sighed. "And we aren't going to."

"Why the hell not?" He demanded angrily. "Bella, you deserve to feel some happiness. You work all the time – you don't live!"

"I do to live!" I scoffed. "I just have priorities. Spina industries isn't going to run itself."

"No, Bella. You're surviving. Not living." His face lost his angry demeanor and walked towards me. "Date her."

Nope. No relationships. I can't. "Sorry, Dad. I have to get to school."

His face fell as I moved past him into the door. Great, now I'm ruining my new found relationship with my Dad. I should have really kept it to myself. Nothing good ever comes from my thoughts.

* * *

I arrived into the school parking lot expectant. Eagerly I looked around for a certain silver Volvo, but didn't spot one. Immediately, my day was ruined. I tugged the glasses over my face, determined not to let a disappointed frown show, and parked off to the side in a shade of trees.

I sat there for a second, my hands still on the steering wheel. _She said she would be here. She promised. Why isn't she here then? _As I was thinking, a shiny car pulled up to my side. I paid them no mind, and worked on controlling my emotions.

A knock, however, startled me out of my musings. I snapped up to see a wild Alice appear. She was all grins and smiles until she saw my face. A frown graced her features, and I didn't like it. Alice should be nothing but happy all the time. Sadness just didn't suit her. _If Alice is here, then that must mean that— _I glanced up to see Rosalie on the other side of the car. Her arms were folded as she rest her head on them. She snapped up quickly when I glanced, and shot me a heartbreaking smile and a wave.

I reached over my torso to unbuckle and flicked a look at Alice to make sure she backed up when I opened my door. She complied easily enough – but of course twirled around underneath my door to take the glasses off of my face and placed them on my head. I rolled my eyes, but shot her a little grin.

"Hey, honey bunch," Alice greeted me, fixing the sides of my hair.

"Honey bunch, huh short stuff?" I bantered back at her, grabbing my school bag all the while.

Alice frowned. "Not a good nickname? I'll have to work on that." I just laughed at her.

"Hey, Bellaboo." Emmett called in greeting. Jasper smiled at me, coming to take the now fuming, dangerous pixie out of my area.

"Howdy, Bella."

"Hello, Jasper." I murmured back at him, distracted by the goddess coming up next to me. "Rosalie," I said more quietly. She smiled again, and wider when my heart quickened. _Did she know? Could she hear it?_

"Hello, Isabella." She greeted me back, but smiled mockingly at the angry Alice. "How was your morning?" _Spent with thoughts of you_.

"Good, and yours?" I questioned back, genuinely curious. She nodded and trailed her fingers above my arm towards my bag strap.

"May I?"

"Oh, Rosalie. No, it's okay, really. I can carry a bag by myself." I protested softly. She just rolled her eyes and flattened her hand against my shoulder. I shivered.

"Are you cold, dear?" She asked, looking up from underneath her eyelashes. I blushed. Heavily.

"No," I sighed, watching as her fingers curled underneath my strap and pulled it off of my shoulder. I wanted to say that her hand lingered longer than necessary. She pulled it towards her body. I never really noticed what she was wearing before, I guess it's because I could never tear my gaze from her face long enough to notice. She wore a snug white V-neck tee shirt that she had tucked into dark denim jeans. Those, too, were tucked into black calf high combat boots. Around the wrist that grabbed my bag was a silver studded bracelet. My gaze trailed up to her neck (totally not staring at her cleavage on the way, mind you) to see a pendant close to her pale neck. "Punk rock, huh?"

She laughed under her breath. "Silly girl, I'm a Hale, part of the Cullen family. We're always 'punk rock.' But, honestly, can a white shirt be considered as such?" _No, not really. But it sure is sinful the way it clings to you. _

"No, I suppose not." Could she tell the way my breath shook? "But I really wouldn't know, I'm all business attire." I added with a wink, covering up my slip. She let out a slow breath and hoisted the bag on her shoulder.

"Yeah; I heard button up shirts and black jeans were all the rage now."

I wasn't wearing dress pants today – I suppose I just wanted to be casual. But she noticed what I was wearing, too. _So? Doesn't mean she likes you!_

"Okay, you guys, the bell is going to ring soon." Edward came out of his car and smiled at me and his sister. "I'll take Bella to class, okay?"

"No, I'll do it!" Rosalie hissed. "Besides, I have her bag."

"Well," Edward continued smiling at her – something I could tell made her angry – and said, "how about I hand you your jacket? And I'll take her bag and escort her to class?" He handed her a leather fabric and gently took my bag from her hands. She looked like she wanted to rip his head off; it was probably a good thing that he can't read minds.

"Edweird, I said I could do it." Rosalie grumbled out, but took her jacket all the same. I chuckled at her nickname for her brother, she smiled at me slyly.

"Rosalie, I don't mind him. Really. Even though it's not necessary…." I trailed off, shooting a pointed look towards all of them. (Alice just smiled at me) "But please put your jacket on, it's chilly out today."

She eyed me and extended her jacketed arm towards me. "Yes, darling. It is quiet biting out today. Wear this, then?"

I backed up, shaking my hands in protest. "Rosalie, no. Then you'll be cold, and—"

"Oh, nonsense!"

"Really, Rose" I revealed her nickname in vain hopes that she would relent. It's not that I wanted to decline her jacket – I wanted to wear it, a lot. I just didn't want her to be cold. And while she did smile, she shook her head and pressed forward.

"Bella, don't make me pin you in a corner and force you to put it on." I shivered at the unintended innuendo in her voice. She handed me the jacket, and this time I took it.

I slid my arms into the jacket sleeves and was hit with an inexplicable, absolutely amazing smell. It was such a good smell – people who bought perfume cold only hope for this aroma. It seemed like something I couldn't dream up by myself. It smelled of vanilla and roses and something else so unworldly. The struggle to not sniff at the jacket was real.

"Shall we, Bella?" Edward called after me, effectively bringing me to reality.

"Right." I blinked, a little dizzy. "Okay, then. Good Bye guys, I'll see you at lunch?"

"Of course, Bella!" Alice chirped, moving with Jasper and Emmett; who all waved back and promised to see me at lunch.

I turned back to Rosalie, prepared to say my goodbyes, but she cut me off. "I'll see you at lunch." She sighed breathily and stared at my torso. She quickly stepped forward, grabbed my hand, squeezed it, and let it drop. Before I could react, she was off, shaking a hand through her hair. (I didn't stare after her, either)

Edward and I set off towards English. We were quiet for most of the walk, and Edward held himself stiffly for the whole time. But he did small talk with me.

"So, Bella, how are you liking Forks so far?"

I sighed, "Okay, I'd rather it not be rainy. Or cold, for that matter."

"Why'd you move here, then?" Edward asked with an undertone of hostility. Okay, then.

"Phoenix was getting too crowded. Renée – I mean, my Mother thought it'd be best if I have more space to work." I explained, nervously running my hands through my damp hair. For some reason, I felt that this Cullen had a serious problem with me, but he was trying to get over it for somebody's sake.

The first half of the day passed by uneventfully. I thought the other Cullens and Hales had wanted to walk me to class – I saw glances of Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie. I thought it was strange how they all knew my schedule, but this _was_ Forks, so it really wasn't surprising. The thing that was surprising, though, was that they let Mike Newton walk me to my classes instead. Rosalie looked like she wanted to come and rip his throat out, but Emmett was there holding her arm.

Finally lunch time came around. I sprinted down the hall and away from Mike, I'd learned that there was a school dance coming up – I didn't want to stick around for him to get an idea or something.

A cold, small, white hand shot out and pinched above my elbow. "Whoa there, cutie pie, where's the fire?" I turned to see Alice grinning at me from her place by the corner of the cafeteria doors. "Did you forget that you are sitting with us from now on?"

I shook my head in vehement panic. "No, no. I was just trying to get away from Mike."

"What'd Mike do?" A voice startled me from behind. I jumped forward in my haste, but a strong grip pulled me around face to face with an angel.

I was still breathing heavily as I explained. "Mike was talking about a school dance, I think he was just about to ask me." Rosalie's frown furrowed even more. I decided I really, really, hated that look on her. "I wouldn't've said yes, I have too much work to do anyway."

I'm not really sure why that calmed her down, but it did, and really that's all that matters. She released her grip on her leather jacket I was still wearing. I stopped smelling at it a while ago – it had stopped smelling like her and more like me instead. "Well, let's go get you some lunch."

Emmett held the door open for us. Rosalie never took her arm off from around my hip; and I found myself perfectly at ease. "Looks like you got more game than me, kid." Emmett chuckled and ruffled my hair, knocking my glasses askew on my head. Rosalie glared and took her arm away from me for a second as she readjusted the glasses. I was tempted to pull her arm back (actually my arm did twitch towards her) but didn't dare try to force her arm back.

"Please, take my game. I'll gladly give it to you." I replied back, brushing stray hairs from my face. "Why don't you guys go sit down? I'll grab my lunch; I'm also assuming that you guys don't want any?" I stepped reluctantly away from Rosalie, and turned halfway towards them, eyebrow raised in question.

They just smiled and shook their heads. Of course not.

I decided to grab a salad; it was simple, practically tasteless and it _had_ to be healthier than the rest of the food here.

My hand twitched towards my glasses when I turned around to notice everybody staring. It made sense, I couldn't blame them at all. Why do I get to sit with the mysterious angels? Why not them? It also didn't help that I wore glasses almost all the time here, too. In Phoenix I could get away with it, the sun was _always_ shining. But Phoenix and Forks are polar opposites; sun and moon, fire and ice, blaze and frost. I suppose, though, if people start asking questions I could say that I got headaches a lot. That would be great actually, with me being a business woman and everything – it's expected of me to have frequent restless nights.

The Cullens and Hales went to sit at their trademarked table, but it was different this time. No, they were all in the same positions; Alice and Jasper towards the back and then Emmett and Edward off to the side, Rosalie was at the end with a single, empty chair right beside her. Really close to her, my breathing picked up because that seat was obviously meant for me. Rosalie must've noticed me staring, she picked up her hand from underneath her jaw and beckoned me seductively with a wink of her eye. I, obviously being the calm, cool, collected and poised business woman blushed and tripped on my way there.

"So, Izzy bear—" Emmett tried to start, but was cut off from an airborne vegetable.

"Shut up, Emmett. Now you're just doing it to make me mad. Her name is Bella. Get it? Got it? Good!" She turned to me with a roll of her eyes and an irritated flick of her head towards her siblings. I giggled softly, ripping open the cheap plastic package of ranch that tasted very much like its container.

"Yes?" I prompted Alice to go on. The smiling fairy open her mouth to continue, but was cut off once again. She groaned in irritation.

Rosalie, however, grinned and continued to cut her off. "Esme is really worried about you, despite what Carlisle's assurances. Although, he's a hypocrite, he wants to see how you're doing, too."

"See, Sugar," Jasper interjected, leaning across the table. "What we're trying to ask you is—"

"Come to our house this evening." Edward sighed softly from Emmett's arm.

_Uh-oh._

* * *

**So, about my other story. Some people said that they would read it, and since I already have half of the freaking chapter done I think I'll post it. It's kind of really stupid, though. I don't even have to plot planned out!**


	5. Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

* * *

There is a certain time for good old panic. There is another time for the fight or flight response. Sadly, I've never been one for confrontations. So the fight or flight response was really just 'flight'. Even now, in a bizarre situation – with five beautiful persons, might I add, I shouldn't be desperately looking around for an escape, in severe panic, too. But I was.

The left wing was cut off from a damn freshman trying to make his rounds, and the right wing was blocked by Jessica and her groupies.

"I'd just drag you back." Alice said, a promising glint in her golden eyes, guessing I was about to run away like a coward.

"Uh – y-you g-g-guys wo-won't want me t-t-t-t-there. I-I have work a-anyway." I stuttered out. I never stuttered, I used to have a serious problem when I was younger, but it only comes out when I'm about to have a panic attack or when I'm scared. I covered my mouth quickly. Clawing, shutting up. I had to stop. I had to stop the words. _Stop. Stop. Kill them. Stop them. Stop. Stop! STOP!_

"Shh. Beautiful, shh, pretty girl. You're okay. You're okay." The smell vanilla and roses assaulted my senses, calming me down immediately. "They just wanted to see how're you're doing. We won't make you go. You don't have to go, okay?" _Rosalie. _Rosalie had pulled me into her lap and cuddled me against her. My head was where her shoulder met her neck and her hand rubbed up and down on my back.

I felt confused. Nobody had ever had the power to calm me down from one of my panic attacks. Some of the old house maids had tried and ultimately failed. And this one was going to be a powerful one – I could feel it in the headache that was forming. How did she calm me down?

As my breathing returned to normal, I noticed a weird current of electricity emitting from Rosalie herself. It burned. It scalded. Ripping at my senses, making me hyperaware of _her. _Everything about her. How she smelled. How cold she was. How her wind chime voice vibrated through her body, and how it ended up in my own. Her hands stopped rubbing my back. I wondered if she felt it, too.

I started to blush. "Thanks, Rose. I'm better now." There was a cool breath of a more concentrated vanilla across my ear as she flipped me around to sit facing the table. My breath caught. There may or may not be two perfectly sized breasts pressing into my back right now. Nope, certainly not Rosalie's breasts. _Oh, gosh. Rosalie's breast are touching my back. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. _

"Good, I'm glad." She whispered across my neck again. I ignored the shiver that wracked itself down my spine.

"Uh, Rose?" I squirmed in her grip. "I'm okay now."

"So you've said. I'm glad, too." Her soft, golden hair brushed my head as she nodded.

"Rosalie, you can let me go know."

"Uh." She popped her lips. "Nope. I don't think so."

She said it casually, like she didn't care if the whole cafeteria was staring at us. I threw a helpless look towards Alice – who just smiled mischievously and waved. I looked towards the others for help. Jasper just beamed and laid an arm around Alice. Emmett ad Edward were just cuddling, not bothering any mind to the world.

Rosalie shifted me in her lap, her hands clasped on top of my stomach. She pushed me down against her; so that my back was quite literally against her front.

"Better?" She asked, her voice breathy in my ears.

"Rosalie, people are staring!" I hissed back, but didn't even try to get up. A part of my brain said it would be futile anyway.

"Like you aren't used to that," she scoffed.

"Rose!"

"Bella," Rosalie sighed, unclasping one hand and reached it towards us. I almost screamed at her to put it back this instant, the weight of her hand, the coolness, and just _her _felt so incredibly right touching me. I actually opened my mouth to say something – but all she did was brush a stray piece of my hair behind my ear. "Let them look."

"Are you really just going to hold me? For the rest of lunch?" I can't say that I wasn't alright with the idea. I was just making sure that she was alright with it.

She wasn't.

"Oh! Fuck, Bella," She wretched herself away and placed her hands on my back; like maybe I wanted to escape her. "I'm so, so, so, so, so, so sorry, Bella. I'm so sorry. I didn't realize I was holding you down – I wasn't thinking, Bel—" She rambled with a quivering voice. So, after she pushed me up, I decided to take matters into my own hands.

Rosalie held my hands earnestly by their wrist, looking desperately into my eyes with her golden ones (the same shade as her siblings – even if they weren't related) trying to get me to understand that she hadn't meant to take my choices away from me.

She clearly thought that it was her fault. I decided to show her that I didn't mind.

By flipping my hands, I was able to grab hers. Then, after her rambling words ran down off of shock, I pushed her back down as gently as I could. She didn't budge at first, not one inch, but understanding dawned in those eyes and she moved to sit back down. Once I was sure that she was comfortable, I plopped myself back down on her lap, and practically forced her arms around me.

"Rosalie? Shut up." Her breathy chuckle resounded in time with the amused looks of her siblings. I turned my face behind me into her neck and whispered, making sure my lips brushed ear (because she really, really tasted good.) "I don't mind." Then I turned towards everybody else. "Are we waiting until school is over? Or could we go now?"

Alice's eyes brightened considerably, and Rosalie hissed a victorious yes behind my ear. "We could wait until school is over, I don't want you to get into trouble with you Dad about skipping school."

"Oh, Alice." I smiled at her in a patronizing voice, "I just don't want you to get into trouble, my Daddy dearest won't mind."

"Why not?" Her befuddled voice fell through to concern.

"Have you seen the paparazzi here?" I pointed towards the windows. "No, you haven't, but they are here. When they get wind of me skipping school it'll only help my image and company."

"How will it help your image?" Rosalie whispered, lips brushing my ear. I shivered, she smirked.

"The whole 'goody two-shoes girl gone wild and skips school' is killer for my image. Everybody'll go nuts!" I exclaimed, flinging my hands in the air. "It'll bring publicity to this school and my company – they'll have to recover our impending trillionaire status, bringing even more attention to us. Renée will love that." I snarked as an afterthought.

"So wait," Emmett unhooked himself from Edward. "You're saying that you actually _do_ have sex in public? And you've tried dope before?" He smiled at me, making sure I knew that he was joking. "Dude! That's wicked!"

"Aw, Emmett, you've been reading up on me? That's so _sweet_." I took a hand from Rosalie's and placed it over my heart, pretending to be touched.

"Esme works at home, Carlisle is off for the day, so yes we can go now. As long as you're okay missing Italian and Biology?" Alice asked, bringing the attention back over to herself. "We only have a page of homework tonight for a lab we're doing tomorrow."

"And… how is it that you know that, Alice? Can you see the future?" All of the Cullens stiffened at my question. Alice grimaced, like she was just realizing that she made a futile mistake. My eyes widened. "Oh, wow."

"Bella," Alice pleaded, her bell like voice low, "not now please, I can't tell you now, you'll have to figure it out on your own."

"I can't figure it out if you don't give me any hints," I scolded, vaguely irritated. "If you guys think that I can't keep a secret, then you've another thing coming. I run a business, you know."

"We know, Bella." Alice whispered again, this time it was strained. "It's just not our secret to tell."

"She _shouldn't_ be knowing at all!" Rosalie hissed at her sister, like I wasn't even there.

Alice looked at her and stared. Rosalie stopped moving, she even stopped breathing. I panicked and turned around, ready to give CPR, but then I noticed her lips moving very, very, quickly, like they were trembling.

"Rosalie? Are you okay?" Was she this upset about me finding out…something, whatever it was, about her family that she was crying? What was this big, dramatic secret that damn near paralyzed everybody talking about it? What could be so horrendous that it made Rosalie, the epitome of beauty, the girl who made you feel like you were a McDonald's patty and she was a sirloin steak, cry?

She blinked and looked at me. "No, I'm not okay."

I winced, "please don't cry. I won't try to guess if it makes you this upset." And I wouldn't either, I realized. I would do anything to make her happy, because she deserved to smile and laugh and be her beautiful self. I would give up the raging curiosity about the Cullens to make her happy. Even if they clearly _weren't_ human. Maybe they were angels. That would make the most sense, being as gorgeous as they are…

"We should go," Edward spoke up for the first time in a few minutes, "lunch is going to end soon." I felt Rosalie nod, and pat my legs softly, a signal for me to get up. I did so reluctantly. But she grabbed my hand and pulled me back to her side once she got up.

"I'm not crying, silly girl. I'll be okay."

"Don't say that!" I hissed at her, ignoring the confused expression on her face. "Haven't you _seen _scary movies? The person who says 'I'll be okay' always dies!"

She rolled her eyes, but went on in a solemn tone. "Scary movie, huh? I guess I deserve that." She bit her lip and winked at me. _Oh. Wow. _"I am pretty scary."

"You wish, Barbie." Was that my voice? Why was is all breathy? I heard Emmett's booming laugh and Alice's giggling chuckle. Great, was I really this transparent? I grabbed my sunglasses and placed them on my face. I was immediately rebuked by the troublesome pixie. "Alice," I sighed. "Contrary to your popular believe, I really do need them."

"For what? Hiding your feelings?" She asked, knowingly. I gaped at her, how did she find out?

"Yeah right," I scoffed, trying to hide my panic. "I get headaches a lot, you know, the consequence of staying up late nights working on legal mergers and trade documents."

"You need to sleep more, the bags underneath your eyes are suitcases." Rosalie came up behind me, my bag in her hand, and hooked her hand around my waist again. I can't say that I disagree with that.

"I do sleep!" I protested, "It's not like you guys do, either. I swear, either it's that or you just smear weird purple crap underneath your eyes. And for Emmett and Edward that wouldn't be so out of context, but—"

"Dude," Emmett gasped. "Did you just make a gay joke?"

I smiled mischievously. "Come on guys! Seriously, with you all telling me I need sleep you're being a pain in the ass!" Edward blinked, trying to get the pun, meanwhile his boyfriend roared back in laughter. Alice raked hands through her hair, head thrown back. Jasper guffawed. Rosalie tugged me closer, hiding her face in my hair, giggling.

"Oh, pretty girl, those were terrible."

I turned towards her slightly. "Okay, okay. I get it, gay jokes aren't funny."

To the right, I saw none other than Jessica Stanley walking up. I didn't think, anybody other than myself, conversed with the Cullens.

"Hey, _Isabella_," she stressed my name. "I was wondering, since you're obviously going, who you're going to the Spring Dance with?" Jessica swayed her hips for good measure.

"I apologize, Jessica." I clipped, dropping my care free attitude that only seems to come out when I'm with the Cullens. "I'm not aware _why_ it's _so_ obvious that I'm going. But I assure you, if you think Mike had asked me, I said no. I have not and will not attend a Dance." I paused, snuggling closer to Rosalie subconsciously. "I thought it was girl's choice, anyway."

She was watching Rosalie with narrowed eyes as she responded. "No, he asked me. I was wondering if you wanted to come with me to Port Angeles for dress shopping. We could catch dinner at … a place."

"Oh, that'd be great," I snapped my fingers. "I heard that Angela asked… Eric, was it? Anyway, we should invite her, too." Jessica opened her mouth, but I cut her off my looking towards the others. "You guys will come too, right?"

"Oh, sweetie." Alice sighed, "we'll be out of town that week, I'm sorry." My heart dropped.

"Week?" My voice small and very much like the question I just asked. "You'll be gone for a whole _week_?"

"No, love." Rosalie vehemently rushed. "Just the weekend." She tightened her grip around me and turned to Jessica. I didn't really pay attention, I was still caught up in how she called me _love_. "Make sure she is in your sight at all times, _Stanley_. If you lose her, I _swear_, if you take your eyes off of her for _one second_, there will be _hell_ to _pay_." She hissed with absolute malice, I felt a thrill of fear roll up my spine. Rosalie Hale _was_ terrifying.

"Yeah, yeah, Hale." Jessica nasally replied, flipping her hair and winking at me in the processes. I felt a rumbling from against my side. Was Rosalie _growling_?

My eyes wide, I turned to look at her.

Her lips were pulled up into a snarl, ultra-white teeth glinted dangerously, her now black eyes narrowed as thin as an edge of a coin. Her fingers twitched against my hip. I discretely placed my fingers in the spaces hers made and squeezed. It wouldn't do well having Rosalie rip that poor girl's head off. Well, in the middle of the cafeteria.

Her eyes closed as her chest heaved, trying to calm herself down. Jessica, having finally noticed the state of Rosalie's distress, squeaked something about her being a freak and ran off. Now it was my turn to be pissed. I thrust against Rosalie's hold, something that used to be comforting and sweet, but now was constraining iron binds – something unbreakable.

"Rosalie let me go." I deadpanned, successfully hiding my fury. But it wasn't fooling Rosalie.

"Izzy, we get called names all the time."

"Yeah? Well, it's going to stop. Right. Fucking. Now." I growled, and against tried to break from the crazy, seductive blonde.

"No. We got to get to my house, remember, darling?"

I sighed, relenting for just this once. "Ride with me?"

Rosalie had started pulling me towards the cafeteria exit along with her family. "Only if I get to drive."

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuckity. Fuck. Fuck. What if they don't like me? Of course they won't like you! How can they like you when you don't even like yourself?_

Rosalie and I had been in my car for at least thirty minutes now. She had insisted on driving, and for once, I was okay with that. Alice and Jasper, and Emmett and Edward took his silver Volvo. Which meant that Rosalie and I were in the car, together.

Alone.

And that was enough to distract me from my impending doom. The wild fantasies played out in my head like a broken DVD player. They were inappropriate, sure. But they got the job done. That was until Rose announced that we were almost there. Then the mind bending panic set in. I was about to meet her parents. I had technically met them before. I wasn't me, though, I was Isabella Spina. The dark-haired female version of Richie Rich. Ms. Calm, Cool, and Collected. Isabella Spina was poised and in control of her environment, like a battalion commander in the battle room. She was viscous, cold, hard, unrelenting – a real Ice Queen. People coward in her presence, followed her every move like a hawk. Hung on her every word like a dying man. People named her the sexiest teenager in history but also the bitchiest and scariest, the most power hungry.

They had even gone as far to compare her, claim that she was, in every way and embodiment, her mother. That, out of all the taunts and the praises, out of all the malice laced words and admiring longs, was the one to finally break her composed mask. And the stone cold face shattered, breaking into thousands, millions, billions of fragments. Underneath, hidden safely in a dark corner of neglect and hatred, of longing and tears, of questions '_Why don't you love me? Why do you hate me? I'll be better, I promise. Love me, Mom, I'm sorry, I never meant to embarrass you, I'll stop stuttering. Just please stop Phil when he hurts me again. He doesn't just hit me, he does worse, _lies a girl named Bella Swan.

Bella Swan is a girl who has a long history – which she still suffers from – of mental disorders, of physical and mental abuse. Both delivered by her Mother and her step-Father. She feels from a monster called Depression and is at a master's beck and call, his name is Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. She has a close friend. He's a sick, sick, person. His name is Sociopath, he goads her, tells her that she can't ever be normal, he makes her anti-social. Another person that also lives in her head is Schizophrenia, he rarely visits, and he plays with Depression.

They're best friends. They're bullies, really. Schizophrenia makes her hallucinate, she doesn't believe her eyes sometimes, she doesn't know what's real and what isn't. Depression bends her, telling her that she doesn't need to live. That there's nothing to live for. He's seductive, coaxes her to pick up the prescription of pills and swallow all of them. "_It'd be just like falling asleep." _He whispers to her one night. Another night he spurts ideas, lying beside her and Schizophrenia on her bed, he says she could drive off of the bridge, or hang herself, slice each damned and dirty wrist. _"Maybe drink bleach,"_ He flips over and his stomach, crossing his ankles, grinning at her lovingly, like he cares for her. Like he's doing this because he adores her, loves her, just wants her to be happy. Telling her to perish her life because he just wants her to be happy.

She always takes his hand, kisses it, and then kisses his scarred wrist, promptly ignoring Schizo's disgusted huff at their display of affection. She tugs him closer, listening to his hums of pleasure, and kisses his cheek, saying_, "not now, soon. I deserve to suffer through this. I brought it on myself. Thank you for being there for me though."_ He frowns with displeasure.

_"__I just want you to be happy. I love you. You're so strong." _Then Depression and every other one of her crippling illnesses fade away, leaving her alone to wake up to the sun, finally coming out of her two weeks daze of unresponsiveness. She wakes feeling proud, that she survived this time, that she almost killed herself but didn't, she pulled out of the daze _victorious_.

That girl, Bella Swan, with the personifications of her illnesses to keep her sane, is me. I, Bella Swan, not Isabella Spina, the one whose got it together and wears the cool shades, is going to meet the parents of the girl she had a crush on.

I hope you understand where the desperateness comes from.

"Bella, sweetie, you're going to be fine. They already love you." A hand. It was a too attractive hand, one that would put the other hand models to shame. It belonged to Rosalie.

"I'm still nervous," I whispered, flipping my hand over to grasp hers with the same desperateness that I'm feeling now. "They love Isabella Spina."

"No." Her musical voice was firm. "They met you, Bella. Not some rich business woman who's all over the news, even as we speak. They met you when you were Bella Swan, because you are Bella Swan, even underneath Isabella. They _love you_." Her words, spoken with such conviction, stunned me. Because she knew, _she knew_. She knew that Isabella was a front. That she wasn't real. That Isabella was a result of many scars, tears, and blood. Well, she didn't know about the scars, tears, and blood part – she didn't even know about my mental disorders. I had a feeling that if she did know, she would go ballistic. Rosalie Hale would give the phrase _'Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned'. _I was sure of it.

"Okay." I said, not really wanting to argue with the beautiful blonde.

And then, after a few miles, there was some thinning of the woods, and we were suddenly in a small meadow, or was it actually a lawn? The gloom of the forest didn't relent, though, for there were six primordial cedars that shaded an entire acre with their vast sweep of branches. The trees held their protecting shadow right up to the walls of the house that rose among them, making obsolete the deep porch that wrapped around the first story.

I don't know what I had expected, but it definitely wasn't this. The house was timeless, graceful, and probably a hundred years old. It was painted a soft, faded white, three stories tall, rectangular and well proportioned. The windows and doors were either part of the original structure or a perfect restoration. My car and Edward's silver Volvo were the only car in site. I could faintly hear the river close by, hidden in the obscurity of the forest.

"Wow."

"You like it?" She smiled and squeezed my hand.

"Yeah, you guys rich or something?" I joked around, they obviously were, and I don't know why I never noticed it before.

Rosalie laughed. "Ready?"

"No," I tugged at my glasses, ready to bring them over my face, but caught myself on Rosalie's glare. "Not even a little bit – let's go." I tried to laugh, but it seemed to get stuck in my throat. I raked a hand harshly through my hair.

"You look lovely." She took my hand easily, without thinking about it, like she had initiated contact with me many times before.

We walked through the deep shade up to the porch. I knew she could feel my tension; her thumb rubbed soothing circles in the back of my hand.

She opened the door for me.

The inside was even more surprising, less predictable, than the exterior. It was very bright, very open, and very large. This must have been originally several rooms, but the walls had been removed to create space one wide space. The back, south facing wall was entirely replaced with glass, and, beyond the shade of the cedars, the lawn stretched bare to the wide river. A massive curving staircase dominated the west side of the room. The walls, the high-beamed ceiling, the wooden floors, and the thick carpets were all varying shades of white.

Suddenly, a hard, but curvy figure all but ran into me.

"Oh, Bella! You beautiful, wonderful, thing! You came! I'm so glad."

I smiled. "Hello, Mrs.—I mean, Esme. It's nice to see you again. In a less dire situation, too. That's always nice."

Esme pulled back, taking the scent of oranges and pine with her, she winked. "Nice catch, honey. I'm glad to see you, too. Are you okay, though, really?" She placed a hand on my cheek, searching for something in my face.

"Yeah, I'm all better." Behind me and Rosalie, I heard Emmett, Edward, Alice, and Jasper come in. "Dr.—Carlisle, seriously, I called you Carlisle." I greeted him as he came around the corner, with a book in his hand, in time with his children. He also noticed my slip.

"Bella, I'm glad you're doing okay."

"Thank you both, you have a very beautiful home."

"Thank you, dear."

"Mom!" Emmett yelled, breaking the comfortable silence. "You'll never, ever, guess what happened today!"

"You got in trouble again?" She pinched the bride of her nose.

"No! We learned Bellarina, here." Emmett flubbed over, throwing a firm, strong, but yet gentle arm around my shoulder. "Has got more game than me."

"I-I don't even want to now. You guys have fun. I need to go to the store to pick up something. Thank you for coming, Bella." She kissed my cheek, Alice's, and Rosalie's on the way out. Carlisle grinned at the sudden arm that Rosalie had placed around me.

"Kids, the hospital had just called me, anyone know a Tyler Crowley? Anyway, I'll be off. Don't break anything." He ruffled his boy's hair and kissed me on the forehead, placed a kiss on Rose's cheek and one on Alice's, too. This family was really touchy.

Once they were out of the door, Rosalie started dragging me upstairs, ignoring her siblings protest. "Come on, I want to show you my room."

"Oh boy."

She led me up the spiraling staircase and up to the third floor. "I have this whole floor to myself." She explained. We stopped at a door. She pushed it open.

Inside her room smelled like her, funny that it was the first thing I noticed. I struggled not to breathe in to deeply as looked around her room. Her walls were a light baby blue color, the carpet the same white as down stairs, by the corner held a large black desk and a very big flat screen TV. The east wall wasn't really a wall, instead it wall replaced with several bookshelves all stacked together, each one filled to the top – and overflowed – with books. The west wall had a large, king sized black framed bed with gold comforter. The walls were littered with black and white photos.

"Well," Rosalie shifted nervously on her feet. "What do you think?"

"I love it." I assured her. "It's very you."

She sighed, "Well, go have a look around, I know you're dying to." She squeezed me hand and went to sit down on the edge of the bed.

I started by the bookcase. "May I ask you a couple of questions?"

"Of course,"

I fidgeted, trying to think of the best way to bring up this subject. "So…. How did Esme and Carlisle react to – well—"

"Their three children being gay?"

"Yes," I turned around to face her then, delighted that she had taken charge. "Wait, what? Three?" At my question she nodded slowly, watching me. "But Alice and Jasper are together and…. _Oh_."

"Yes. Oh." She took a step towards me, arms raised in front of her like I was going to try and run away. "It bothers you then?"

"No! No!" I sputtered out, taking a quick step towards her to confirm that I wasn't repulsed in any sort of way. "It's cool. It's fine." _It's perfect_. _Really, Bella? _Still _thinking that you have a chance?_ "Love is Love is Love is Love, you know?"

"Oh yes, I'm quite aware." She smiled sardonically, although I had a feeling that it wasn't exactly aimed towards me. "But, in any event, Carlisle and Esme were quite fine with it. They used the exact mantra you use. Esme was thrilled." She murmured under her breath.

"Oh, that's good. So where are you going then, on the week that Jess, Angela, and I are going dress picking?"

I heard her teeth snap close before she responded. "Camping, when the weather is nice out Carlisle pulls some strings and we get out of school." She looked at me face, panic overcoming her features. "I'm sorry, ma belle, I wouldn't be going if it weren't absolutely important."

"Does it have to do with the 'thing' I'm supposed to figure out? Even if I have no base to start off from?" I was a little ticked. I didn't have any right to be, of course, I know better than anyone about secrets. But it was irritating. Like you were a dead, dehydrated person, and on top of this building, maybe two or three feet higher than you, was a cool, tall glass of water, but you didn't have a ladder. That's how I felt right now.

"Yes." Her clipped tone sounded out.

"And you're pissed because...?" I prompted, hoping to entice her into coming out with the truth. But before she could say anything, a knock sounded out on the door.

"Hey, it's me Alice. Can I come in?" Her gentle pixie was barely constraining laughter. She walked in, anyway, without invitation.

"Okay so, Alice." I called her attention, even if it was already on me. "I know what I'm going to be for Halloween; a banana!" Alice and Rosalie just looked at me weirdly.

"Bella, what the hell—"

"What? That doesn't ap**peal **to you?" And then I burst out in made cackles, slapping my leg because I'm _so_ funny. The laughter quickly turned real though, when I imagined the bizarre looks that I must be getting right now. I opened my eyes to see that it wouldn't matter anyway; the tears were blocking my vision. I could however, get some of Rosalie's 'what the fucks?' in my ear.

"Okay, Bella, Rosalie. I have one for you now." Alice stated, clearly happy with my joke – or lack of – in any circumstance, it made her happy. "I have a sex tip, it's only if you two ever get laid, however."

"Oh no!" Groaned Rosalie.

"Okay, so sex tip, ready? When he puts in in, yell 'What are you doing in my swamp?!"

"OhmyLord." Rosalie drew out angrily with a huff, but she smiled all the while whilst I clapped hands with Alice, newly found tears running freely down my face.

Today was a spectacular day.


	6. Murder and Vampires

**A.N. Hey guys, so here's chapter... I don't know six? Anyway, warning for crappy chapter, it's a filler and it's rushed. Really, I hate it, but I've re-written it so many times that my eyes hurt. So I apologize for this absolutely shitty chapter. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, SM does. If I did, Bella would be a werecat and would mate with Rosalie. I also don't own Kristen Stewart, sadly.**

* * *

_A ten year old me was sitting in a vast, white, empty room, save for the large, inverted in color piano. I ran my fingers, occasionally plucking out a note, over the black keys. The white hull of the beautiful instrument glimmered vaguely in the ever fading light of the sun. I had been told tales that vampires, goblins, werewolves, and ghouls could only come out at night. If that were the case, something could attack me soon. _

_After all, it wasn't like we had garlic or salt, maybe even wolf's bane, covering the edges of our window sills._

_I drew a breath out as I glanced at the black and white Roman numeral clock for the nth time. My instructor was late. An hour late. _

_I was disappointed. My instructor, Mrs. Varna, was the closest thing that I had to an acquaintance. She liked to talk to me, treat me as if I were actually a human being, not like a shiny trophy that my mother shows off at every chance. I believe that we were well on our way to becoming friends, I had never had one before. And the last real conversation I ever had was back when I lived with Charlie, my father. I really liked the idea of having friends. If not friends, then at least just one. I shifted in discomfort, rustling the boot shaped bruise Phil had given me just yesterday. _

_The door slammed open, the cold rush of air forcing my hand away from my face and a startled gasp out of my throat. _

_It turns out that I am about to be attacked, only not by a supernatural creature by any means. Just Renée, my mother, who takes part in the emotional abuse I receive daily. Not that I blame her, I deserve every bit of it._

_ "__Hello, Renée." I called quietly in greeting, ducking my head down so I didn't have to look at her accusing face. A feeling of deep, dark, dread fell through to my stomach. She had something to do with why Mrs. Varna wasn't here right now, teaching me advanced intermediate piano skills. _

_ "__Daughter," she greeted back, phlegmatic as always. "Waiting for your piano lessons, I presume?" Something in her voice made my hackles rise, maybe it was how her voice was so calm, cool, and not with the hidden fury at my social ineptitude, maybe because her voice sounded like the calm before the storm. Or maybe, turning my head to look at her now, it was how her black eyes glinted with dark craziness that you see in the eyes of Asylum convicts, and it was how she practically smelled of power and control – a scent that burned my nostrils with its acidity. _

_I paused my evaluations, thinking of a dire response that wouldn't result in a verbal lashing and Phil's physical bashings. I considered lying briefly; after all, being the daughter of a pronounced business woman, you learn to lie beautifully, and then I remembered Renée's office triumphs, only succeeded by black mail, intimidation, power, and the ability to detect, practically smell, lies. "Yes, mother, it appears to be so. Such as it being a waste of time, Mrs. Varna is an hour late." _

_ "__Then why are you still here, Isabella?" She sneered a patronizing tone, walking around the piano like a shark circling a raft. I sat up straighter, keeping my eyes locked with hers because something told me that if I so much as blinked, there would be hell to pay. "Maybe because you two were … friends? Maybe because you thought that she could actually like a fucked up roll of mental disorders and fucking nightmares?" Her voice grew progressively louder, and I struggled to not flinch at how much she was hurting me. "Maybe because you cared for her!" She didn't ask. _

_ "__No, Renée," I kept my voice as equally phlegmatic as her voice had been before. "Feelings are useless messages that the brain sends out over to the body, they mean nothing – they are only meant to distract you from accomplishing your goals in life. Feelings are messy, and I want absolutely no part in them. How could I? After all, I will be a business woman soon, emotions are the last thing on my list." I was good. I was brilliant, Oscar worthy. Speaking in an emotionless voice as if I were reading off of a text book, there was no reason for Renée to doubt me. But she did. _

_Warning, red, flashing lights blared around in my head. _Careful, Bella, there's a shark in the water. _"Liar." She hissed, grinning manically the whole time. I shifted, swallowing a clay fist of agony and stomach wrenching panic. _

_ "__Whatever would make you say that, Renée?"_

_ "__Oh, I don't know. Maybe the fact that when I ran into her she was gushing 'Oh, your daughter is such a nice, young, thing. A bit shy, though. I was wondering if it'd be alright for me to take her out to lunch. She needs to eat more, I can see her ribs when she breathes.'" She mocked Mrs. Varna's voice perfectly. "You think that she was your friend!"_

_ '__No, no." I stumbled off of the seat of the piano. "That's wrong, friends aren't right. They mess with your brain and distract you from your path." _

_ "__Then you should have listened to your own advice." She stalked forward, something glistening in her hand. "Really, Isabella, you did this to yourself." I tripped and fell to the ground. _

_ "__D-d-d-did w-w-what?" I stuttered, and my eyes opened wide with horror and I quickly went to cover my mouth. Renée hated that, more than anything, she hated me and my weakness. She stepped again and slapped me across my face hard._

_ "__Isabella, do I need to call Phil in here?"_

_ "__No! I mean, no you don't need to do that, mother." _

_ "__Good," she studied my face, malice and severe hatred covering every inch of her face, oozing out of her every pore. "You killed her, Bella." I flinched, harder than when she had slapped me. Because I really was. I really was Bella now, she broke down my fronts again. "I just hoped that you learned your lesson." And with that she flipped a photo frame on my lap and strode out of the double beige doors. _

_I picked up the silver frame and held it gingerly. The picture was one of our outside pond, little springs of water dutifully recycling and recycling. But near the edge, in all of her thirty-two years, sat Mrs. Varna. She was tied by her hands behind her back, a piece of white cloth gaging her mouth, weights placed on her ankles, and a chilling look of heated fear and dread. _

_I turned around and dry heaved into the tiger lilies._

_The photo was labeled 'Swimming with the fishes.'_

I woke up screaming for a breath, sweat ran down my face as I threw the covers off of my body and ran into the bathroom.

The freezing cold water felt delicious against my skin, so, in typical Bella fashion, I decided to slap myself. And that felt good, too, clearing, but the beg of my face demanded me not to do it again. I did it anyway. The memory of Renée killing my piano instructor still hits me to this day.

"Bells?"

"Yeah, Dad?" I called, slightly gasping for breath.

"I have a surprise for you."

I grabbed a towel off of the rack, scrubbed my face, and skipped lightly downstairs. Remembering to grab my sunglasses and toss them onto my face.

"Here," I sighed, trying to hide my exhaustion in my voice. Last night after I got home from the Cullens had not been an easy one, they only proved to be a distraction against my work. They were quite welcome to be my distraction, but it was vaguely irritating to remember that I had a pile work of legal documents on my desk. Irritating because I actually thought that I could be a normal teenager for an evening.

In our living room was two new men. One was bound to a wheelchair and the other stood very well above the six foot height scale.

"Bella, you remember Jacob and Billy." Charlie greeted with a hand swept towards the two males. "Jacob's gotten tall, eh?" No, I couldn't really say that I remember them very well, but I knew better than to say that I didn't.

"Of course, hello Jacob and Billy." I stepped lightly towards them, standing beside my father. The one named Jacob, with short, rusty colored hair, and a boyish face, took a tentative sniff and then scowled at me immediately after. I returned the glare directed towards me with an arch of my eyebrow. He sniffed with another disgusted look on his face and turned away.

"Isabella, I would say that it's been so long since I've last seen you, but you're all the talk in this town. Hell kid, you're all over the newspapers and the TV." Billy smiled with his wrinkled, tan face.

"Well, you've both have certainly aged well." I beautifully lied, I really didn't know how they had aged, then turned to Jacob. "And you, how tall must you be? Seven feet?" Jacob grimaced, but obliged me all the same.

"Yeah, you're so tiny though. I thought famous, rich people were supposed to be taller. Or dressed in frilly pink dresses and stuff."

"Ah, you're thinking of princesses. I'm the queen, however." My voice was slightly challenging.

"Oh, why don't you two go and do teenager-y things, while I and your old man catch up, huh?" Billy smiled at me once again. I turned to Charlie in confusion, because weren't they best friends? How much could they possibly have to catch up on? Dad chortled in wild amusement and bent down to my ear, pretending to wrap his arms around me in a hug.

"I think he's trying to set you two up."

I frowned a bit and turned further into Charlie's shoulder. "That's gross."

Charlie pulled away, hand on his stomach, bent over in silent laughter.

Jacob rolled his eyes at him, which I _really_ did not appreciate. "Yeah, Bella. Let's go into the kitchen, I'm sort of hungry." He stomped that way, avoiding my glare entirely.

"See you in a bit, Dad, Billy."

Jacob was leaning against the kitchen counter, when I walked in, a billion questions and accusations on my tongue, he leapt forward and grasped my hand, hard. "Why are you hanging out with those bloodsuckers?!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" I struggled to get my hand free, his touch was too hot, too hard, and it was making me sick. "Like bloodsucker as in vampire? Are you fucking crazy?"

"Don't you play with me." He sneered, throwing my arm away so that it smacked against the wall. "I bet they told you all about how my pack were werewolves, right? Those filthy leeches don't know how to keep their fangs in their mouth." He stalked away, raking a hand through his terrible haircut. "They've broke the treaty! Those damned Cullens, don't know how to keep their bitchy mouths shut!"

_Whoa, back up mother fucker. You did NOT just insult the Cullens. _

"Who the fuck do you think you are? Attacking me and then insulting perfectly innocent people? And are you crazy? Vampires and werewolves? Did you forget your medication today?"

He stopped pacing and turned to look at me. "Wait, you really aren't messing with me? You don't know?"

"Know what?" I screamed, very confused. The Cullens couldn't be vampires, right? Vampires are mythical creatures, as are werewolves. But the more I thought about it, the more it made sense, they hadn't eaten before at all, at least not in front of me. Which, I was at their house all day, and they hadn't eaten once. They were pale, really pale, like they had no blood. They sometimes didn't act human, either, talking as if they were from another century, another time. Chivalry was alive and well with that family. Another instance was when Rosalie didn't get cold yesterday when she handed me her jacket. Or how they all walked so gracefully and looked so beautiful. But when Rosalie growls…

But then again, they couldn't be! Vampires drink blood and can't come out during the day. And they haven't lunged for my neck nor have they burned to smoldering ashes.

_Bella, you know Hollywood! _That was true, as well. Hollywood very rarely ever tells the full truth, so what if it were the same for them? Like burning in the light. What about the blood though? They obviously had to drink it, would that make them monsters?

_Come on, can you imagine Rosalie, Alice, or even sweet Esme killing somebody innocent? Of course not. _Would it be so bad if they only killed already dying people or killed terribly, horrid people? Murderers, rapist. That, as sick as it sounds, wouldn't be so bad. I mean, one life for many others that they could end up killing? They could have saved thousands of lives just by taking a hundred.

What to do about it though? How should I react? Ask them if they're vampires and then if no, laugh about it, claiming it was a joke? Or if yes, run away screaming, calling the Police, kicking and fighting to get away, screaming monster behind me as I go. That's not very logical, they had done nothing to warrant that behavior from me, they had been nothing but nice and have never tied to harm me before. It's ridiculous that the second suggestion was even an option.

"About the Cold ones." Jacob whispered in horror, "oh, no, I just broke the treaty, I just broke the treaty!"

"Jacob!" I hissed. "Are the Cullens vampires?"

He looked at me anguished, and opened his mouth to respond. Interrupting our stare down was mismatched harmony of bells and rings that belonged to the doorbell. Jacob sniffed and sneered his ugly face. "Ugh! They smell so bad."

Jacob with very quickly working towards the top of my shit list.

"Hey, Charlie!" Alice? What was she doing here? "Bella had left her coat over at our house, I just wanted to return it to her." Uh, no, I didn't, the only jacket I had been wearing yesterday was Rosalie's, and I left it on her bed for her.

I hopped into the leaving room, stepping besides Charlie by the door. Alice's face was bright and cheery, but her eyes were black and her voice had a tint of dread and heartbreak in it. Behind her was Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle, Jasper, Esme, and Edward, with the same looks of heartbreak on their faces. I flinched, Rosalie's expression hurt the worst. With her grasping her shirt where her heart was and the face of grief, pain, and heartbreak brought tears to my eyes. It was like I could feel her pain, like I was breathing the same way as her, with gasping breaths of air. I took a step forward, my sole attention locked on her. She didn't meet my eyes.

"Oh! Of course, why don't you guys come in? Bella could show you around." Charlie happily requested, "Billy had told me that he was just leaving."

I broke my gaze with Rosalie's dead, stone cold face. Billy and Jacob shared the same look of disdain when they swaddled up next to me. What was their deal?

Suddenly, the Cullens snapped out of their solemn looks and awoke with violent anger, even Esme had a viscous scowl on her face. Rosalie, however, let out a feral hiss of fury and snapped forward to grab my arm. Unlike, Jacob, she grasped it with a comforting cool hand of gentleness. Not bruising my wrist, either.

"May we, Charlie? Only if we aren't intruding." Carlisle calmed effortlessly.

"You aren't" He assured, grinning at me wickedly. Or rather, he was grinning and shooting lewd glances towards my hands, which I had entwined with Rosalie. "Let me just walk them out, you're welcome to go in."

Charlie moved past them, in tow was Billy and Jacob. Jacob hissed like a spoiled brat at the family when he walked past them. I quickly bent down to grab a piece of concrete and flung it at the back of his head, which landed with a satisfying _thump! _He shot a glare at me, which I responded by throwing another piece at him, right in his mouth. Emmett chuckled, and Rosalie softened her death glare with a look of tamed amusement.

"Come on you guys, we have a lot to talk about." I murmured under my breath, making sure to tighten my hold on Rosalie so she wouldn't slip away.

I led them into the living room, gesturing to sit down on the couch and the recliner. They stood. Rosalie let go of my hand.

"Okay, so." I walked away to the window. "Vampires, right?"

"Bella, are you scared?"

"No, just tell me."

"Yes." Esme breathed, her voice shaking, but she quickly stepped toward me arms out like I was the one who needed comforting. "Bella, love. We wouldn't do anything to hurt you. We would never harm you. I promise."

"I know." I frowned, "and I'm not scared, just very curious. I know you guys wouldn't hurt me. I know that, if you wanted to you could have, I could be dead." They winced.

"You're taking this very calmly." Edward observed. "It's not normal."

"I think." I ran a hand through my hair. "I knew that you were different. You guys hardly acted human sometimes."

"I take great offense to that." Emmett called. Rosalie smacked him dopely across the head, keeping her gaze trained on me. Damn, why is she so pretty?

"Alice, is that the jacket you were talking about?" In Alice's small hands was a leather fabric, one that looked vividly familiar. "That's Rose's."

"Bella! What the hell—"

"It looks better on you." Rosalie calmly answered for Alice. I blushed.

"Okay so check point. One, you guys are vampires. And two, you drink human blood?"

"No!" Carlisle exclaimed. "We drink animal blood."

"Like Bambi?"

"Are you fucking joking right now Bella?"

"Just trying to diffuse the tension!" I snickered behind my hand. "That's cool."

"That's it?" Jasper drawled, "You're just accepting it just like that?"

"Yeah." I hopped on my toes. "I don't see the big deal."

"The big deal is that we're monsters, Bella, killers." Edward the always dramatic man scolded me.

"Well, you certainly are in the monster encyclopedia. But honestly, if I were to run away screaming, it'd be racist. Like, it'd be the equivalent to running away from a black man because of his color." I paused. "Or something like that. Besides, what have you ever done to me to warrant that behavior from me? You don't deserve to be treated like abominations. That being said, I won't tell anybody your secret, okay? If it needs to be kept, that is."

"Oh," Carlisle nodded. "It does."

I flickered and went to sit down. "Wait! What the hell is wrong with you guys?" I screamed at them, a newfound fury possessing me. "Do you know who I am? If you guys being kept a secret is so imperative then why the hell are you hanging out with me? I have paparazzi on my tale every minute of every god dammed day!" I screamed out, gripping my hair with panic_. Oh gosh, if they get discovered because of me… they'll hate me. They won't even look at me._

"Bella," Rosalie spoke for the second time since she got here. "We've been very careful to avoid those cockroaches." She stepped forward and took my hands in one of hers and removed my glasses. "We even gave them a false call to report you at the family diner." She stepped closer, nearly flushed with me, and sighed. "Well, we would have ignored you; but there have been recent complications. And for that, I apologize."

"I don't understand." And I really didn't. What kind of complications? What was endangering the good family?

"And it's better that you don't. For now, anyway." She leaned forward, and everything _stopped. _My breath, my heart, my thoughts, everything. Zip, out the window. Because _she was so close_, so, so close, I could taste her breath, a more concentrated version of her vanilla and rose perfume, it made my mouth water. And finally, after she leaned her head on my shoulder, my heart started to work again. "Are you okay? Your heart stopped for a second."

"You could hear that?" I squeaked, utterly stiff. Rose nodded from her place on my shoulder.

"Yeah, our senses are heightened when we are transformed." She said it so nonchalantly that it was staggering. They were vampires. _Vampires_. Why wasn't I frightened? It didn't make sense that I wasn't but it also did make sense. I turned my head to see that the Cullens had left the living room. "They wanted to give us privacy."

"Oh." I hesitantly lifted my arms up from my side, and, after Rosalie unwrapped her arms from our hug and placed my hands around her, I settled into the chilly embrace. I didn't mind the cold, the cold was Rosalie and I never would mind Rose.

_Wow. Try not to sound too obsessed there, Bella._

Rosalie drew back after… oh, I don't know, a minute, an hour, a day, a month, a year, or maybe even a century, "Hey."

"Hey," I grinned and rubbed up and down her back. "What's up?"

"Come with me tomorrow."

"Where?"

"To a place that I like the most out of this podunk town. Well, actually it's not really in town, more outside."

"Okay, after school good?"

"It'll take all day."

"Rose, we skipped school yesterday."

"I know, I just feel like you deserve an explanation for my anger towards you learning about us."

"And you'll answer my questions about vampires?" I asked, growing excited. "You'll tell me all about you?"

I could_ hear_ her roll her eyes. "Yes, ma belle."

I flushed. "Rose, you know that I can speak French, right?"

"Yes," She stiffened hastily and drew back even further. "I've called you it before, you were too distracted, maybe trying to… think of that ridiculous banana joke."

"Rosalie?" I asked, stepping forward when she took two steps back. "Are you okay?"

"No, Bella. Stay right there."

"Why?" I'm not even going to lie, I pouted.

"Sorry," Rose breathed, "I haven't hunted in a while and you smell _way_ better than most humans, so, please, just hold on."

I did wait, obediently and patiently. Whatever Rosalie needed, I would give it to her.

_You know, I'm pretty sure this is what they call obsessive, you've passed the boundaries of crush, sweetie. _

_Shut up_.

"Okay," Rose murmured, sounding ashamed. "I'm okay now."

"Cool, I'll go with you tomorrow, I want you to explain everything. Including why I smell better than most humans." I demanded, not angry that she had almost sucked my blood.

"Not now? You don't want me to tell you know? That's not the Bella I know."

"Okay, listen here Rosie posy pudding pie, so pretty that she made everybody cry." I sing songed. "I know that I'm okay with everything, but it's still a lot to take in. I might need a whole day to nap. Okay?"

Her eyes widened. "Okay." Then. "You think I'm pretty?"

I was _so_ done. "Honestly! That's the only thing you heard? My petty song for you?"

"Sorry, sorry" She laughed, walking towards me to grab my hips. "I'm flattered."

"Yeah, yeah." I huffed, "Where are the vamps? I want to say goodbye and goodnight before I pass out."

"Outside with Charlie." She took my hand to lead me outside. "Thank you for not running, Bella."

I turned my face into her shoulder, smiling. "Of course, Rosalie."

And, after a second or two of realization, after a real fucking crazy day, after the panic and the feeling that my world was being switched upside down set in, I knew that I wouldn't ever run.

Ever.

"Knock knock, it's my cock!"

"Go away, Emmett."

"Bella, is that a bruise on your wrist?"

"Uh…"

"I'll fucking kill him."

* * *

**Okay, so, I'm so sorry for this chapter. The next one will be a billion times better and better written. Also, Rose's and Bella's pseudo date is happening. **


	7. Chocolate and Vanilla Part1

**A.N. Hey guys! Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews from the last chapter. This story was added into a community so thank you for that, too! I feel like I need to explain stuff for this chapter, so if you want an explanation for Bella and why I chose this to happen this early, look at the bottom of this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. *Gross sobbing***

**Oh! And I know I said that their "date" would be in this chapter, but change of plans, next chapter for sure! Sorry!**

* * *

Rosalie Hale was angry.

If that doesn't completely terrify you, then you obviously need to reevaluate your life. She was stinging bees, she was a ripping fire, she was a beautiful tornado on doomsday, she was a graceful tiger, stalking its prey. Terrifying. Heart gripping, sweat bombing, head rushing, black eyed vision petrifying. Nightmares are the after effect from Rosalie's angry face.

I took a deep breath and reminded myself that Rosalie wasn't going to hurt me, and that just because she was this glorious monster, I shouldn't be scared.

I wasn't scared of her, precisely, just for her. And maybe for Jacob, even if the asshat almost broke my hand (something that had been stressed by Rose) I feared for his life. Okay, maybe that was being dramatic, Rosalie wouldn't really hurt him, much, and Carlisle would stop her from being eaten alive. Because from what I understand now, is that Jacob is actually a werewolf, and he said something about packs.

"Rose, I'm fine."

"You aren't"

"I am."

"No."

She wasn't even trying to negotiate with me. She was just sort of telling me, and it kind of made me irritated, not angry, because I knew that somehow she was really just worried for me. But that doesn't mean that she had to go all Mother Teresa up in the joint.

"Rosa—"

"Bella, no. I'm not arguing with you."

"You don't even know what I was going to say!"

It's been like this ever since I learned their oh so dramatic 'life threatening, monstrous' secret.

It really wasn't a big deal. I mean, vampires, cool.

And maybe I was acting a little too cool about it, after all I just learned that the supernatural resides in small podunk town, USA. I should be freaking out and running away. But…

Honestly imagine, if someone you knew came up to you – having proof, mind you – and told you that they're a vampire/werewolf/whatever-supernatural-creature-is-out-there, how would you react? Keep in mind that this is the 21st century, and with all of the Dracula movies and Buffy out airing now, would you really be scared? Is it such a real surprise, after seeing it on TV so many times, after having it mentioned in movies and books like Harry Potter and Anne Rice, would you be the least bit startled? Especially now, with the equality rights for every person, would you hold it – something that they can't control, nor probably want to be – against them?

No. At least, I wouldn't.

But nobody believes that I should be this calm about it.

How else am I to react, though? Shit bricks and lose the only few people I care about in this world? I'll have Charlie, but now that I have more I need the Cullens, and with them being immortal, I could have them until my dying day. If that makes me a petty, weak, selfish, asshole, then so be it.

Rosalie is huffing and puffing and blowing houses down, which is funny because the thing she is mad at is a _wolf_ himself. Alice can't even look at me, but she's holding my hand, anyway 'you're really weird, Bella' she says, like I should be hating them. Jasper is sending me curious looks when he thinks I'm not looking. Emmett is chill about it, not really caring and sitting on our couch watching baseball. Edward said he went off to go hunt, after of course throwing a hissy fit. Esme is holding me in her arms, like I will actually run away and she wouldn't be able to handle it if I did. Carlisle is trying to calm the gorgeous storm that is Rosalie Hale, while looking at my hand for fractures, _while_ being angry himself.

"We have a treaty with those _mutts_." The insult sounded wrong coming from his mouth. "We don't cross their land and they don't expose us, or hurt our family." At first I thought that he was talking about Rose when he said that, because the air coming from Rose wasn't just anger, it was fear and pain, too. His gentle probing after declaring that I just had a very large bruise and a tiny, microscopic fracture in my radius, told me otherwise. He was talking about me. Tears welled up in my eyes, and I hid my face in Esme's sweater. They were more than I could ever hope for.

Esme tightened her grip on me, bending down to kiss the top of my hair, and Alice stroked soothing paths on my hand with her thumb.

"Jacob said he broke the treaty." I spoke when I could get my emotion under control.

I felt Esme nod, but Carlisle was the one to respond, through clenched teeth. "He did. However, even under the circumstances of your injury, we won't consider it broken."

"Why not?"

"It's more a convenience than not, it just makes everything easier, besides, Jacob Black is still a young wolf, they tend to make mistakes. I suppose we should consider ourselves lucky all he did was damage to your wrist." He paused, looking at me sadly, "it could have been much worse."

I didn't want to think about worse.

"Mirrors?" I asked. Carlisle and everybody, even Rosalie, looked at me in confusion before a look of comprehension dawned on their faces.

"No," Alice snorted. "Rose would have destroyed the earth if she couldn't mull over her perfect features every two minutes."

"Yeah right," Her voice was still burning anger, but it seemed to be a smolder rather than just an inferno. "You look at yourself, spinning around in your clothes, just as much – more frequently, than I."

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Children," Esme sighed, "Let us get back to the subject."

"Yes but of course," Rosalie murmured, resuming her pacing in the carpet. "I propose their extinction. They wouldn't be missed as they aren't really children of the moon." The way she suggested murder so bluntly, as if we all were discussing the weather, hit me to the bone.

"No!" I exclaimed, struggling to go after Rose in quick fling of downright dread mixed with fear. "You can't! He said a pack of werewolves, you might die!"

"Shh, Bella." Esme whispered into my hair. "But she is right, it's best to not provoke the beasts." She called louder to the rest of them.

"Esme!" Rosalie gasped. "You, you out of all the people should be on my side about this!"

"I am. I'm upset that he hurt Bella, too. But we can't just obliterate them for that." Rosalie started to interrupt, Esme counter-interrupted. "I know that you have your reasons, perfectly as legitimate as they are, we still can't destroy a pack of ten or more werewolves. Bella is right, we would die." There was an un-added part to her sentence, _'And I'm pretty sure Bella wouldn't be able to handle us being dead.' _As silent as if was, it still rang louder than all of the sounds I've ever heard. Was I that desperate, that needy and that see through?

"But—"

"Rosalie," Alice said, mild amusement trickling in. "Butts are for sitting."

"Are you smoking—?"

"No, it's 'Are you milking my tits right now?'"

"Emmett," Esme scolded.

"What's going on? What the **_fuck_** is going on?" I grumbled in a mock old man's voice. Could you tell I was confused? What was wrong with these vampires? One minute, we were talking about something absurdly serious and the next we were joking around, using derogatory terms to make others laugh.

I was ignored. "Are we all okay now?" Carlisle asked. And I understood.

This family stuck together. They felt each other's pain and joy, and encouraged their triumphs and was never jealous of anybody or themselves. Because they had each other, and that's all they'll ever need. Nobody judged, and they rarely got angry with another. Even when the situation was tense, somebody had their back and they knew that.

In this case, Rose's family had her whole back.

I felt out of place. Like a pretender. Sitting in Esme's lap like I was one of her children, like she loved me as her own. It felt wrong, not that I didn't like it, but it felt wrong.

"I guess." Rosalie reluctantly replied, head bent down as if shamed. "But I won't allow this incident to be passed by as just a regular occurrence. I want him punished, probation of some sort maybe."

"I wouldn't think of anything less." Carlisle, ever the white hatted saint, smiled in relaxation.

"Ten seconds." Alice called out, a dazed look in her eye.

"For what?" I turned to whisper into Esme's shoulder.

"Before your Dad comes back inside, and Edward, hopefully gets back on time."

"Here," A velvet voice came from the kitchen window.

"Edward, we don't walk on peoples windows."

"Sorry, ma."

_Why_ was Charlie not back in here yet? Did it seriously take him ten minutes to check a squirrel out?

"He takes a forever to look at something."

"No, he just wanted to give you and Rosalie some private time together.' Edward causally said, his eyes burning a new butterscotch. Oh gosh, did he know? I blushed furiously and hid my head back in Esme's neck.

"What does that mean, Emo boy?" Rosalie sneered, arms across her chest, glaring at the boy two seconds away from revealing my crush on her.

"Nothing." He drew out with a cattish grin on his face. I kind of wanted slap it off of him. "I was only joking."

"Listen here, broody—"

"Okay!" I exclaimed, sitting up straighter on Esme to get the attention on me. "You guys don't need to report Jacob for anything." They all growled their disagreement. "But I understand that you will. Just… you guys have to take me with you."

"No. No. No. No. No. Fucking hell, no." Could you guess who that came from?

"Yes." I shot back, "I won't have you or anybody else injured for me. It's final, Rose."

"Carlisle," she growled like a petulant child, "Tell her that she can't, she might get hurt."

"The fuck, Rose?" Emmett yelled from his position next to Edward. "You really think that I would let anything happen to your human?"

"Emmett's right." Carlisle placed a hand on Rosalie. "No harm will come to Bella." He turned away from the broken beauty and spoke to all of us. "I'll set up a meeting for this weekend." I nodded. It was a good schedule, tomorrow was Rosalie's outing with me. _It wasn't a date._ And I could get the paperwork from the last trade and supply demands done.

The back door opens and shuts. "Honey, I'm home!" Charlie, the ever goofball joked and come around the corner. "Whoa guys, you look like you just prepared a war."

"Oh, no." Alice flapped her hands about. "We were playing charades, Bella sucks by the way, I feel like you need to show her the ways of the Jedi Knights before she plays another game."

Charlie smiled and laughed adoringly at the vampire girl. Alice was obviously now his new best friend. "Well, did Bella at least show you lot around?"

"No! Bella, you were supposed to show us around?"

I rolled my eyes and gently patted Esme's arm, letting her know that I wanted up. "Okay ladies and gentleman, welcome aboard train _Chocolate and Vanilla. _The rules of this ride is to A: keep your hands and feet inside the carriage at all times, and to B: enjoy the scenery by gasping and ahhing at the appropriate times. No back sass either. Remember to enjoy the ride. If you have questions or comments, please visit our website at .org." I monotoned in my best tour guide voice. "If you look to your left, you'll see white walls. If you look at your right, you'll see white walls with decorative pictures on them.

"They were painted—"I spoke with dry, dead humor as they obliged me by turning their heads left and right. "With paint." Rosalie gave me a soft smile. "Okay, folks, that's the end of this fun, fun ride. Please exit to your left, and enjoy the rest of your day."

Charlie's face was red with laughter and the Cullens looked like they wanted to laugh, but kept mock angry expressions on their faces for my benefit.

"Man! I paid a dollar for this crap?" Emmett threw pretend air down and stomped on it. "This is the worst day of my life!"

Rosalie was just rolling her eyes while the others chuckled. She looked calmer now, serene and in control. It wouldn't do good to have an angry vampire on the grounds. I couldn't help but stare at her like a gaping idiot. I knew that vampires by nature are very sexual creatures with a vivid sex appeal, but this was just getting ridiculous.

Her teeth shined and sparkled like in those goofy commercials. Her blonde ringlets flipped over her shoulders mesmerizingly, I wanted to touch them, to tug on them, to kiss them and wake up with them in my face. I wanted to see her eyes, happy and golden butterscotch like they are now, every day and every minute of my day. She closed her eyes and her natural black lashes ghosted over her cheeks, casting crawling shadows on her snowy, milky, skin. She was doing that thing with her lips again, where she licks them before biting on them with sharp, glinting teeth. She only does it when she's thinking about something.

And like all the other times she's done this, it unfailingly drove me to the very brink of my sanity. I wanted to see her doing this, everything she was doing. I needed her to, I needed her like dying man needs a last wish. Like a runner and his maze. It was like I was blind, and she was my first sight. A blind man looking at the sun.

A tight, warm feeling resided in my chest. Curling and lying, tears coming to my eyes. It raged in my heart, seeping down into my muscles and into my bones. And it burned. And it _burned._

A wet gasped ripped out of my throat. Immediately my body stopped living for whatever it was before. Oxygen wasn't sustaining me and gravity wasn't holding me down. I was flying. And I was free. Wind ripping at my face, icy breaths coming out. There was a pulling, and suddenly I wasn't so free anymore. There was a thousand steel cords attached to me and wrapping around Rosalie. I didn't mind being trapped down then.

Because, even if I didn't realize it, even if I wasn't completely okay with it—

Rosalie Hale, beautiful, gorgeous, stunning, ethereal, hurting, lonely, Rosalie Hale had become my sun. My moon. And all of the stars.

An unseen force, one that vaguely felt like _Rosalie_, was playing with my heart, fingering its strings like a harp. I beg it to be careful, my heart had been broken many times before, and it plays anyway. Promising to be gentle. It was a beautiful, haunting melody, one with deep guilt and hurt, but also happiness and joy. But the moment I got use to its music, there was ripping, tearing my heart strings, an unseen force laughing in glee as it snipped away.

And after. It leaves me dying, gasping in a pool of darkness, my heart bleeding, deformed and barely pulsing. Suddenly, I understand when they say love kills, that love is a battle axe. Because, it, she, this new feeling left me mutilated. My only salvation was _her_.

It hurt though – how could I ever live up to this goddess? How could I ever match up to her, be worthy of her, make her the happiest that she could be?

I couldn't.

Somewhere in the back of my hypnotized brain, I registered Jasper's flinch.

"Bella?"

Looking away from her hurt like hell, but I did as her eyes flickered over to meet mine in concern. "Yeah, Jasper?"

"Are you okay?"

I blinked, relying on Isabella a little bit. "Of course, why wouldn't I be?" I praised my other half for a second. He just eyes me suspiciously, but let it go.

_Is this what falling in love and unrequited, and never could be, love feels like? _I rubbed at my heart absentmindedly. _I don't like it._

* * *

The Cullen group left after Carlisle's pager had rang off, he grumbled about stupid footballers and their testosterone. They all left with hugs – Edward was more of an awkward one armed one – but Rosalie's felt _so_ good. Like I just found the lost part of my soul. It hurt, too. It stung and pricked, poking holes into my chest, spearing my heart like a shish kabob. It hurt to hold her. She was covered in thorns. But I was so cold alone.

So I hugged her back, harder than I ever had before, she seemed surprised, but willing, happy, and grasped me back tighter.

"I'll see you later, love. Tomorrow, I'll pick you up at… eight?" She whispered in my ear before she left.

"Make it six. If it isn't too early for you. The sun isn't up yet then." I couldn't hide my eagerness to see her again.

She giggled. "You're adorable. Sweetie, the sun doesn't harm us."

"What?" I pulled back.

"Tomorrow." A promise. Then a kiss to the head. And she was gone. I stood by the door, wishing that her lips had landed on skin instead of hair.

"Bella?"

"Hey, Dad. I'm really tired, is it okay if I go to bed? We can talk girls later." I winked and headed upstairs, hiding the darkness creeping into my body like a disease.

I didn't sleep that night, there wasn't even rain or anything. I was just depressed and thrilled. The thoughts and feelings fighting over each other. Flipping over to my side, I saw him. Clad in all skin tight black, pale skin sticking out, and black shaggy hair thrown around, was Depression watching me with his trademarked sad face. He held his arms out, stepping towards me. I noticed that this time he wasn't really full, just a faint, flickering hologram.

_"__I've not seen you in a long time."_

_ "__I know, I'm sorry."_

_ "__You're happy with the Cullens, you don't act like Isabella, you act like Bella, the real Bella. Not the scared little girl you could be, but happy, beautiful, sarcastic, and funny Bella." _He sat down on my bed, stroking my arm underneath the covers. I pulled my hand out and tried to touch his arm, like all of the other times I've picked his hand up and kissed his wrist. My fingers went through his hand and landed on golden sheets.

_"__You're not here."_

_ "__No," _Depression shook his head with a smile. _"I'm not. Not really anyways, just partly, you're upset about something that could wreck what you have now. I want you to be happy, so that's why I'm here, or rather not here."_

_ "__But you're practically see through."_

_ "__I told you, the Cullens make you better."_

It all made sense now. I was happy, I was getting better, because of the Cullens. He was just barely there to help me out of this black grave that I was digging for myself. He wasn't the one who could do it, though, it was Rosalie.

But I couldn't have her. I wasn't good enough for her. I was broken and shattered, curbed to an illness that couldn't honestly be fixed. She was perfect, unblemished and untouched, sparkling in all of her grace. The only thing really wrong with her was that she was lonely, sad, and angry. Really angry.

_"__Now, stop that."_ D reprimanded me. _"Tell me what's wrong."_

_ "__I fell in love today."_

_ "__That's marvelous!" _His face was the very epitome of excitement, a complete one-hundred and eighty degree turn from how I was feeling. He hopped off of the bed, twirling around. _"We must celebrate!"_

_ "__I'm dying." _I told him, face totally blank and voice dead.

_"__What?"_ He stopped moving, stopped cheering for joy and redemption, his voice screamed heartbreak and cracked with his very breath.

I nodded_. "I'm dying, without her everything hurts. But I won't ever have her, she's too perfect for me. Whole, unlike me."_

_"__Bella, stop!" _He whispered in an anguished voice. _"Stop."_

_"__It burns when I breathe."_

_"__Bella, please."_

_"__Why, out of all the things in the world, why do I love things that couldn't possibly love me back?"_

He stood frozen in front of me, face detached, then it filled with life, something I've never seen before. _"How do you know she doesn't love you? Have you asked her?"_

_ "__That's not how it works."_

_ "__Why not?"_

_ "__It just doesn't."_

He started to pace, walking around with an expression akin to anger. _"Bella, I refuse to let you throw your life away because you think you aren't worthy enough." _

I just lied dejectedly on the bed. _"I'm scared, too."_

_ "__Of that bitch."_

_ "__Hey, you're talking about my mother there, Bucko."_

_ "__She's not your mother. I don't understand why you care about her."_

_ "__I told you I love things that don't love me back."_

Depression just looked at me with a disbelieving look on his face, instead of arguing with me, he just sat on the edge of my bed. _"Just be careful then."_

_ "__She'll find out anyways."_

He shook his head. _"Maybe, but what can she do about it?"_

_ "__What would Renée not do?"_

_ "__Beat her to the punch."_

I scrubbed a hand over my face, irritated that he wasn't quite understanding my dilemma. _"What the hell are you talking about?"_

_ "__Tell Rosalie your weaknesses before Renée can."_

I didn't understand that one. I had a lot of weaknesses, but also I didn't, if that even makes sense.

There was a new presence in the room. She was wearing all black, too. A leather jacket and motorcycle boots, straight reddish brown hair and aviator mirrored sunglasses on. Leaning against the edge of my window sill was Isabella Spina.

_"__Tell her about us." _It hurt, too, to look at her. She was everything that I wasn't, badass and untouchable. Her voice was seductive honey mixed with deadly poison.

I shook my head furiously. _"No. No. No. No. Fucking hell, no. She'll run away, she'll hate me!" _Depression, always the sensitive person, rushed quickly towards me, soothing my hair and spewing whispered comforts out of his mouth. Isabella just rolled her eyes.

_"__You're so fucking stupid." _D cut off his words to shoot her an angry glance and a bark of protest shot out of his mouth. Isabella just merely raised her hand and he shut up. Even in my mind she was the most powerful thing in the room. _"I've been watching, do you honestly think that she's all that perfect?"_

I shot off the bed and stomped towards her, fury lighting in my veins. How dare she? _"How dare you? How fucking dare you say that she isn't perfect? Rosalie is the most beautiful and gorgeous thing in this universe!_

She grabbed my wrist and threw me against the wall, pinning my arms above my head. _"Honey," _she sneered, tilting her head closer to me, lips almost touching mine. _"I never said that she wasn't perfect. She obviously isn't but—" _I thrust against her grip, mad as hell again. _"She'll be upset when she tells you everything about her, and you tell nothing at all in return. And she may not love you, but she sure as hell cares about you." _Her hard black eyes softened just a tiny bit. _"Can you be just happy being her friend? If she's happy with somebody else, would you let her?"_

I flinched as I thought about it. Her? Being with somebody else? No, I wouldn't be happy, I would die. Hell, even thinking about it felt like I was dying. _But what if she were happy with them? _

_"__I don't see how that has to do with anything."_

She snorted her disgust. _"It doesn't, I just wanted your answer." _

_ "__Who has the corner in the idiocy market now?"_

She flicked her hair back with a cruel smile. _"Tell her." _

I pulled away sat back down on the bed, trying to think. I should tell her, I couldn't try to woo her if we didn't know everything about each other. But, then again, I'm still assuming that she could have feelings for me. I could try though, right? Nobody would hold it against me, they would understand. Sort of. Maybe. Not.

I did have to tell her though, regardless.

Is this what she felt like when I found out about her secret?

The grey light spilled in through covered windows. I felt a whisper of a kiss to my cheek and heard a flippant 'see you later'. Isabella and Depression faded with the light, they couldn't live there. Dark creatures don't survive in the sun.

So how can I survive the brightest sun in the world?

It was wrong, sick to put her on a pedestal. To think her unblemished so she could do no harm, I knew she could. I knew that she's probably killed before. It didn't matter. They weren't human, as much as it hurts, they weren't. So is it fair to hold human morals to them? No. That'd be like being scared of a tiger for eating a gazelle, it's a ridiculous notion to be disgusted by it. They are our predators and we are their prey. Simple as that. Done. If they need blood to survive, then who am I, or anyone else, to shame them for it?

That's not what was really upsetting me. I had fallen in love like the way a fire starts, before the flames ripped up into a beautiful, albeit destructive mess. It starts of cold, then just a little spark, then the flames come, into a full fire of brilliancy. I'd have to be careful to not burn the forest down.

"Bella?"

I jumped off the bed, startled at the sudden appearance of the very girl I was pining after. She balanced confidently on the balls of her feet, with her hands touching the ledge on my window. She had her head tilted to the side, studying me with her golden, fiery eyes. Red, ruby lips tilted to the side with a curious amount of discomfort.

"Rosalie!" I hobbled after her, suddenly very aware that I was only in a blue tank top and short shorts on. "What the hell are you doing up there? Get down before you hurt yourself!"

She let me take her hand (I shivered at the touch of near ecstasy) before commenting. "Aw, you're all dressed up for our date." My heart totally did not jump at that.

"Only the best for you. A top that I've just bought at Thriftway and shorts I've had since I was fourteen." Once her feet were firmly planted on the wooden floor, I let go of her hand. The absence of touch stinging painfully.

Immediately after I let go, she brought me in a hug again, arms wrapped around my neck and waist. I wondered if she felt it too. "Well, you look cute. Are you not going to change? We're going to hike."

I pulled back to give her a look, before hiding my face back in her neck because I was dying_. Dying_ without her. "Hiking? Off to kill me in the woods?" She nuzzled my hair and growled.

_"__Bella!"_

"Alright, alright I get it. I get it. Talking about death around vampires isn't funny." She pulled back, grinning, slightly complacent.

"Ah hell! What'd you do to your eyes, Bella? Not sleep at all?"

"Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner." I mumbled, muffled by Rosalie's hands squishing my cheeks together. Not to mention my heart was thumping out of unison, I wanted her to kiss me. I wanted her lips to press up against mine in a bruising manner. I wanted it to hurt. I wanted it to match the pain I was going through. Fighting fire with fire to ebb away into water.

She gave me a beautiful sad look. "What was on your mind?" _YOU!_

"Nothing much." I flipped my hands like Alice does and stepped away. "Let me change and I'll see you back here." I turned around to walk away. "And we aren't done talking about how you got up into my room.

"Yes, ma'am." For some odd reason, I felt two eyes gazing at my ass. I wanted to check, but if she didn't love me, I wanted her at least to be attracted to me. So I let her stare, adding a little swing in my hips when I heard a distinct growl.

I tried not to laugh out of complete and utter joy.

_Tried._

* * *

When I walked back into my room Rosalie was sitting on my bed, gaze directed towards the window.

"Hey," I greeted shyly, trying to stop the parade of things that I could do with Rosalie on my bed, "sorry I kept you so long."

She looked towards me with confusion. "You didn't. Are you ready?"

I checked my pockets for my stuff. "Yeah."

She gazed at me with a small smirk on her face. I fidgeted self-conscious, was something wrong with me or my outfit? "What?"

"Oh, nothing." She stood moving past me, "It's just, we match."

I looked at her, not that I wasn't before. She was also wearing jeans and a black sweater with a white collar peeking out. "Oh." I muttered lamely and went to follow her. "We're taking my car."

"I know. I didn't bring a car anyway."

"Then how did you get here?" I wondered, confused. Did she run here? Her family lived on the outside of town, in the deep forest. "Rosalie, you didn't run here?"

"I did."

"Rose!"

"Don't worry, Bella." She chuckled, stepping into the passenger seat. "I'm okay. I love to run."

"Rosalie Hale! You didn't run all that way here!"

"I don't know what to tell you, Bella, other than it's a vampire thing."

"What is a vampire thing?"

"Can't you wait until we get there?"

"No." I hissed, starting the car to back out of the driveway.

"Bella, sweetie." She dragged my hand away from the steering wheel and grasped it with her own. Friends held, and touched each other though, right? There wasn't a way she could like me. "We're strong."

"Right." I scoffed. "Because that fucking helps." I wasn't sure I was talking about her response 'we're strong'. I think I was talking more about how she wasn't helping my unconditional love for her by rubbing her thumb up and down my hand. She wasn't going to make things easy, huh?

"Bella." She sighed. "I will tell you. Once we get there. But for now, we're going to talk about what is, and has been, bothering you."

"Rose, I already told you—"

"I know, I know. Nothing is wrong. You're all okay and spiff and dandy. But Bella," she breathed and leaned over, giving me a kind whiff of her mouthwatering scent. "I know you better than you know yourself."

I struggled to get my thoughts together. "Uh huh." I – if you haven't noticed it – am probably the most eloquent person ever. "Just one for the road?"

I _heard_ her roll her eyes. "No, Bella. You're going to wait."

_Ugh. _"I was just quoting Arctic Monkeys."

"Mmhm, sure."

"Do you know them?" I asked. It seemed unlikely that is classic beauty would listen to anything other than orchestra.

"We have an Emmett." She said it as an explanation.

Ah.

I glanced over to her, glimmering as her own sun. My heart clenched wonderfully and grimaced painfully. Isabella was right. I am such a fucking idiot. I fell in love too fast, like a rollercoaster ride, too fast, too quick. I haven't even known her for a month, and I don't know anything about her. It wasn't love at first sight, because that really wasn't realistic, or smart. It was deeper than that, a phenomenon that was unworldly. It felt like a vampire thing, something inhumane. Was I just desperate for love that I had been neglected from, or was I incorrect in assuming that I was in love with her, and instead I was in lust?

What about that Romeo and Juliet quote? 'These violent delights have violent ends, and in their triumph die, like fire and powder, which as they kiss consume.' That one was about the consequences of falling on love too fast. On the same subject, though, Romeo (Who has the same letter for the start of his name as Rosalie, and was older than Juliet) fell in love with his younger counter part in less than an hour. It wasn't fake, Shakespeare had made sure that his readers knew that their love was genuine, in the worst of ways too. Eventually, the two lovers met their demise by taking their own lives when they thought each other dead. People don't _just do that_.

As for me, I couldn't even begin to imagine a world where Rosalie didn't exist. It had to have been something vampire-y. Maybe she did a Bela Lugosi move on me, vamps could do that, right?

I just fell too fast, and too hard. Nobody was even there to catch me, either.

The question was, what do I do?

"Take a left on Route 66." Well, that wasn't exactly the answer I was looking for.

"Rosalie, there is no Route 66." I grumbled, my voice leaking its desperation.

"There is, just that little dirt path there." She pointed out with her free hand. Her other was comfortably entwined with mine. "Bella? Promise me something."

"Anything." Jeez, Bella, why don't you just drop to your fucking knees and propose to her, telling her that you would die for her.

She smiled despite my social ineptitude. "We don't lie to each other, we're going to keep things honest."

"Totally? No half-truths?"

"Totally and completely honest."

I shifted in my seat, uncomfortable. I still wasn't sure that I was going to tell her about my sicknesses, but now I really had no choice. "Okay." I relented, because how could you even say no to her? "But, Rose?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"I know close to nothing about you, while you know close to everything about me. Google and all that."

"And I'll fix that this evening. I just don't want to give you nightmares." She sighed, "I don't know anything about you, either. Other than you're stubborn, sad, an Einstein prodigy, a ruthless battle commander who always gets what she wants, and a seventeen year old teenager who has the world on her shoulders and thinks she can jump buildings in a single bound."

I chuckled, grimacing harshly all the while. "Yeah, well, that's about it really."

"No," she disagreed with a shake of her head. "It's not, you're more than that. You see, I may not know much about making friends, but from what I understand is that you actually have to tell them the deep stuff."

"Uh oh. Like what?"

"Like… I don't know, what's your favorite color?"

"No, no." I shook my head, pretending to be offended. "You just crossed the line."

She laughed softly, squeezing my hand. "Seriously, what is it?"

I looked at her, before looking back to the road (Can't have her thinking that I'm an unsafe driver.) I didn't actually know what my favorite color was. I never thought about it before. But looking at her, in all of her brightness and everything that I wasn't, her lightness to my own darkness, I know what it was immediately. "Gold."

"Gold." She echoed, tilting her head my way. "That's specific, why?"

_Because it's you. It's all you and all of your beauty and goodness. It's the color of your eyes and your hair. The color of your aura, maybe? _"I don't know. Suddenly I'm keen of it. What's yours?"

She looked away, an expression akin to embarrassment. "It's sort of two color combinations, that's okay, right?

"Of course," I nodded.

"Chocolate and vanilla."

"_Now that's_ a specific color, why?"

"I think they just fit together. Have you ever seen the tubs of ice cream that have the two colors split down the middle? It just looks good."

"So you like the colors together because you wanted to eat the ice cream?"

"No, goofy." She giggled and then sighed. "Even as a human I've never liked ice cream. I just think they suit each other." She reached over with her opposite hand to pinch a stray lock of my hair. "But my chocolate has some red in it, only in the sun though." I blushed and looked away, trying my honest to God hardest to not squeal out of joy.

"Where to now?"

"Turn left."

An easy silence engulfed us as we made our way down a bumpy road with a car that really wasn't meant for anything other than concrete and the trimmed roads.

Her comment about the ice cream in the sun was weird. It wasn't a good idea to have it out in the sun for obvious reasons. She had grabbed my hair, though, while saying it, could she be talking about my hair? If she was, then was she vanilla? Was she flirting with me, or was I just being the wistful, cliché teenager who falls for the golden girl? I felt like this would be an easy concept to grasp for somebody so normal.

"Bella, may I ask you a question?"

"You just did," I smirked, amused at my own joke that I'd stolen from Charlie.

That was dismissed. "What do you think about the Stanley girl?"

"Jessica?"

"Who else?" She growled. "And why do you call her by name?"

I looked at her quizzically and slowly said. "Because it's her name?"

"You're fraternizing with the enemy!"

"Ohkay, whoa there ducky." She sat in her seat fuming about Jessica. I decided to go on. "I, despite popular belief, don't really like to talk bad about people. But… if I were to say anything, I'd say that she is…quidnunc."

"Quidnunc?" She laughed, apparently shaken out of her anger. "What the hell Bella, are you some sort of word expert. Most dictionaries don't even include that word."

"Well," I flushed. "I think they should, it's interesting. And hypocrite, Rosalie! You knew what I was talking about when I said it!"

She laughed heartily and pulled the hand she was holding up to her face, I struggled to not reach out and stroke her blonde locks or her perfect face. I groaned softly under my breath.

"Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"I heard that. What's wrong?"

"Stop listening!" I sputtered, shooting her a wide eyed crazy look.

"Bella."

"It's not important." I murmured, feeling her sweet, chilly breath wash across my hand.

"Bella we said no lying." She reminded, as if I had forgotten.

"And I'm not. It doesn't matter." I wonder if she could also hear my heart breaking with that fantastic hearing power of hers. Could she also hear how my beaten, scarred, mangled, ripped and torn heart cried her name?

"Okay Bella." It was whispered.

"Look—" I exhaled in a frustrated huff. "Look I don't mean to hurt your feelings, okay?"

All of the feeling nerves that I had in my body projected itself to every crease and pressure of the places her hand was, tensing themselves for her to let go. She didn't, to my intense relief, let go. And I was grateful for that, because while she was the sun to me, her hand matched my cold frostiness. It was something familiar, something I felt that I could match with my personality, something in my domain.

If I thought about it, I could match us to Robert Frost. Rosalie was bright fire and I was cold ice. I agree with him, too, about favoring fire, she _is_ stunning. I also agree about perishing by ice would suffice for death, but I don't agree about choosing it. I squeezed my hand back, grinning slightly.

"I won't ever lie to you Rose." I promised, if I was good for anything, it was my promises. But, we live in a world that is built on promises constructed by liars. That's the great thing about life, huh? To love something death can touch. Isn't it a fearful thing to dream, to hope, to pray, and then have it spoiled, rotten and just _gone_?

"I just wanted to make sure you're okay." She kissed the back of my hand and set it back down.

"I'm fine, Rosalie." I turned to smile at her, adding a wink for good measures. But at this point, I no longer remember if I'm lying when I say 'I'm fine'. I mean, it's not as if I'm in control of the chaos in my mind.

She looks like she doesn't believe me.

And I wonder if she does know me better than I know myself.

I want to tell her that I'm probably going to let her down. That I'm probably going to be the one she flinches in pain about soon. My name will taste of poison on her lips and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I'm not good enough. I want to unlock my clenched teeth and tell her the lies that I've hidden deep inside of my stomach, they're building up, like black sharks. And it hurts. And it _hurts_. I want to let my skeletons go, I want her to examine them and tell me that she had her own. I want to because suddenly the world is starting to stop smelling like vanilla and roses. I wonder if that means I'm losing her.

My world gravitated around her right now, her hand. Because if she lets go it might as well be another sign for 'this is the end' it would be for me, anyway. So I cling tighter, and tighter, somehow trying to tell her words that I'm too afraid to speak. In my mind I'm pacing and pacing, trying not to stutter, but it never comes out right.

I blame her. She makes me forget my name.

"Turn right on one-ten." She commanded just as I was about to ask, I obeyed silently, startled at how difficult it was to keep my gaze on the road while hers was focused on me. "Now we drive until the dirt ends," I could hear the smile in her voice.

"What's at the end?"

"A trail."

"Cool, you sure know how to show a girl a good time, Rose."

"Naturally," I saw her smirk. "I won't let you get lost. Is that a problem?"

I considered lying jus briefly, but her slack of hand made me reconsider. "Ah! Okay, Okay, I get it, I get it!"

"No lying." Was her stern voice.

"I just… you have to be very patient with me. Remember city girl? I'm not that good at hiking."

"I've got you, Bella."

We drove in silence for a couple of moments while I contemplated this new round of horror.

"What are you thinking?" Rose asked impatiently after a few moments.

"Just wondering where we're going."

"Oh," she said, perhaps a little surprised. "Edward gave me this place for my birthday a couple of decades back when we first lived here. I like to go when the weathers nice, which is sort of rare."

"Decades?" I asked, my interest inexplicably peaked. "Won't you ever tell me how old you are?"

"Does it matter?"

"I think it does."

It was silent for a moment. "I was born in 1915. In 1933 I was changed when Carlisle found me. Physically I'm eighteen, but really I'm just an old seventy-five year old grandma." She joked around, her words had an undertone of hostility, hurt, and unbelievable pain. I flinched with her, as if I felt her pain, which, by the constricted of horror and panic in my chest, I felt like I could feel her pain.

Is this what love, the damned instrument of torture, does to you?

"Carlisle found you?"

"I'll tell you later, Bella." Her grip tightened impossibly on my fingers, I felt that if she squeezed them anymore they might break. I didn't tell her that it hurt. Because it didn't, nothing would hurt as long as she was with me. I also didn't want her to feel like I wasn't there for her.

"So… who all knows about it?"

"You told Charlie, I assume?"

"Actually, no?" I glanced a look out of my eye to see if it upset her. It looked like it may have. "I was upset last night, a little. So I went to try to get some sleep."

She groaned. "But you didn't actually sleep."

"Try being to operative word."

"I want to ask what upset you."

I flinched. "Please don't. I don't want to lie."

She didn't respond.

"How long is the trail?" I jumped desperately, hoping to hear her voice.

She looked at me with her large, golden eyes. "Five miles."

Five. Miles. It was me who didn't say anything back this time, I didn't want her to hear my voice.

We drove in silence for the rest of the ride. I could feel curious waves coming off of her, and I could think of nothing to say.

And then the road ended, constricting to a thin foot trail with a small wooden marker. I parked on the shoulder and looked towards Rosalie. She hadn't let go of my hand and neither have I. Finally, she cracked a grin and eased her fingers out of my steadfast grip. She stopped moving her hand when the edges of her fingertips touched mine, she wanted me to pull away too. So, I steeled myself, and pulled away, grimacing at the unexpected, dominating agony.

It was warmer outside than it had ever been since the day I'd arrived to Forks. I kept my sweater on though, it felt like a barrier of protection against the inventible rejection that I was soon going to receive. Rosalie pulled hers off, throwing it on her seat before she shut the door.

"Ready Bella? It's this way." She turned around to face me and I stifled a gasp. She was wearing hers unbuttoned at least three down, her hair tousled and skin shining luminously in the damp light. She was a sun. Her own sun.

My heart pitter pattered and I couldn't stop my blush. I saw her raise a perfect eyebrow at me and the tilt of her head.

I blame her for making me feel like this. I don't care if I was being childish about it. She made me love her.

* * *

**Okay, so, long ass chapter, sorry. I know I promised an explanation so here: I realize that some of you will be angry about how fast Bella fell in love, and she did. She really, really did fall in love way too fast. But you also remember that Bella is mentally sick, so, so, sick. Not to mention that she hasn't had anybody to love her before, so yes part of it is desperation. But another part is how, being two broken people, their relationship isn't going to be the healthiest. Bella is completely obsessed with Rosalie and lives around her. Rosalie has been broken before too, in the worst of ways, and she needs somebody weak and vunerable so she feels like she won't be attacked again. They will get better! And their love is genuine, so don't be too mad, okay? They just have to heal.**


	8. Chocolate and Vanilla Part2

**Hey, guys, I'm really sorry I haven't updated in over a month. I really don't have any other excuse beside school. I don't know, have you ever felt like you weren't good enough? For something or someone, or maybe you don't even know why? I wonder if it's okay to feel like this for days on end. Anyway, sorry about my emo shit. This is a short chapter. I know that pisses you off. But the next one will be longer.**

_Rosalie_

"Come on, Slowpoke!"

"I'm trying!"

I turned around just in time to help her off of a large tree that had fallen down a couple centuries ago. Her heart slammed against her rib cage as I took her scalding hand. I let go instantly as soon as she was stable. I wasn't sure – now that she knew my family was really a vampire coven – if she was scared of us, me in particular, or not.

Last month, Jasper, who still wasn't that comfortable around humans, had almost snapped. A girl named Sandy had walked past our table, smelling like mint and thick iron, tossed her short hair that matched her name. Edward's eyes had widened and he shot up to grab Jazz's arm before he could lunge after the poor girl. Alice and I had understood what was happening immediately, Emmett was a little slow so Edward explained Jasper's impending murder.

Unfortunately, as much fiddle strings as Carlisle has, we couldn't just waltz out of the school like the graceful creatures we are. I went up to the front desk, where Mrs. Cope was sitting behind the stack of papers that always seemed to be piled on the much too cluttered desk. We vampires have an advantage, something that makes us the world's most deadly hunters. Our beauty.

Carlisle has a theory about that. Since out physical features had been heightened to perfection, he thought that our traits and behaviors had as well. So far, the hypothesis had been correct. Alice may have been somewhat clairvoyant in her human life. Edward was always been a very perceptive boy, sensitive to all around him, thus being a mind reader in this second life. Jasper had also been sensitive to the feelings around him, but he had been scary charming too, he could change the mood of the room with a little smile and a quick joke. I guess the proverbial southern charm was a true thing. Emmett had always been strong, working on the railroads when he was human. Esme, being the natural mother that she is, has the power of loving. Carlisle is compassion. And I have my beauty, not that the others don't, but I was stunning in my human life.

So, with Mrs. Cope, I used this to the upmost advantage. With just a little tilt of my head, dropping of my voice, and a lower of my eyelashes, she was wrapped around my finger in a millisecond. I remember that her heart had pattered in her chest wetly, too. Much like Bella's now.

However, Mrs. Cope's was attraction, could Bella's be, too?

The thought thrilled me to no end. I know her feelings had changed towards me somehow, though. At the Swan's house before we left, Jasper had a pickup in Bella's mood. By the tone of his voice, it wasn't a good thing. I had turned around to see her looking at me with a mix of wistfulness, panic, heartbreak, and something else. The something else looked an awful look like how Esme looks at Carlisle. I hurriedly asked him and Alice what she felt. Jasper, being the ever white hatted saint, zipped his lips and threw away the key. He likes to pretend that he had a confidentiality with his 'patients'. I begged, pleaded harder than I had in all of my life times. But to no avail. Then I tried to threaten, if anyone knew something about Bella's feelings towards me, then I deserved to know.

That didn't work, either. Actually, I was ignored, while Esme fretted maternally over Bella, wondering how she was taking the new information and if she was scared of us. Jasper, the bastardly hypocrite, decided to share said information, he assured that she wasn't in fact scared of us. Alice was squealing in her devilish pixie ways. Carlisle had the old man brow crease going on and Emmett was whooping at the radio which was detailing the Sea Hawks game that was currently transpiring. Edward was brooding in the back of the seat, much like I was.

It was times like this that I really did love my dramatic brother. He was really the only one that understood that we are dangerous to the already broken human girl. And she was dangerous to us as well. It'd be too easy to slip up and not notice a paparazzi cockroach that had indeed been following Bella around for the past couple of weeks. If they got a picture of us – which they would try to do because we would be the most beautiful things that they had ever seen – somebody from one of our old school back in Alaska would recognize us. Then we would have to deal with the Volturi and blah blah blah. The only difference between me and him was that he wanted to force Bella's decision and leave. Knowing fully well what that would do to her. Alice told him that she would probably end up killing herself and I would probably do the same. He had shaken his head and disagreed, always thinking that he knows best and that he's the smartest and best person of our family. He screamed something about how she would get a chance at a normal life, one that I couldn't ruin. I decided that I hated him again, and I let him know it, too. Honestly, I wanted to rip his head off. He didn't care about her, he just wanted to protect his food.

Bella Swan is a strong and independent woman, even if she doesn't feel like it. Sure, she isn't the most mentally healthiest, hell she has more problems than the rest of us combined. But she is strong for getting and working through them. Carlisle had requested that he become Bella's doctor, so naturally he got her medical file and was heartbroken for the girl he considered a daughter. I didn't get to see it, Doctor's confidentiality and all. But I did get the gist of it.

My only worry was what she would think of me whenever I told her my story.

Would she be disgusted? Would she pity me? Or would she understand?

"You're awfully quiet, Rose." The girl who had snatched up everybody's hearts commented to me solemnly. That was another thing. She had been so sad lately, since this morning to this moment. The minute I knocked on her window I knew something was deathly wrong, she was sitting on her bed, looking towards the corner of her room with her mouth moving like she was having a full conversation with an invisible force. Her eyes had bright purple rings underneath them, and her shoulders were hunched forward as if she were expecting rebuff at any moment. Throughout the hike in the woods, I had been cracking the stupidest jokes in failed hopes that she would brighten with her seven times award winning and charming smile that she had won in Rolling Stones weekly. I wanted her funny, cute awkwardness again. Her dry, witty, sarcastic humor, Where was my Bella?

But as I turned to look at her. I knew that my Bella was the same Bella right beside me now. She was just vulnerable, and feeling a tad insecure. By the way she kept hiding her wrist by covering her arms and ducking her head, she felt threatened. She felt naked for some reason. She felt like she wasn't good enough for something.

And that, is the most absurd blackest blasphemy I have ever had the displeasure of seeing and thinking.

"Bella," I called, taking her hand and intertwining them with my own like I had in her car. "What's wrong, love?"

She blushed while her heart slammed a thousand beats of a drum against her chest. "Just thinking, you?"

"Just thinking." I mocked her answer softly, ducking down to look her in the eyes while I helped her over a fallen, mossy branch. "About you."

She flushed an iniquitous red again. I breathed out. I had the best control in my family next to Carlisle, but it still burned in the back of my throat. "What a waste then, huh?"

Ohhhhh myyyyy goooodddnesss. "Stop this."

"Sorry, Rose."

I sighed. She was unbelievably impossible. Honestly, how could she not see how perfect she was?

"Hey, Bella?" I asked, my voice teetering on the edge of vulnerability.

"Yeah?" Bella yelped, almost startled at my sudden demeanor change.

"We're almost there." I paused, considering what exactly to tell her. "But…uh… I have some things to tell you. And I suppose I don't want you to be upset – or anything. I'm over it." _Liar _"I'm okay." _Liar! _

There was a silence accompanied with a curious fog. I heard her beautiful long, white fingers tap against her jeans before she responded. "Gotcha, Rose. Only if you don't freak about me too."

I stopped, only for a moment, before resuming my pace. So something did happen to America's sex icon?

"We are nearly there yet?" She teased when I turned to look at her, pretending to scowl the while.

"Yes." I smiled at her sudden change of mood. "Do you see the brightness ahead?"

She squinted into the depths of the dark green wooded maze. "No? Should I?"

I berated myself for remembering that humans didn't have the same eye sight that we did. "It could be a bit soon for your eyes." I teased slightly. Her succinct reply was to stick her tongue out at me. "Do it again, little girl, and I'll bite it."

Her eyes widened comically, her shock pulling her delicious tongue back into her mouth. She then – without fail – blushed darkly. As if I wasn't already aroused enough.

"I guess it's time to visit the optometrist, then huh?"

I smirked wider.

After a few hundred yards, Bella started to see it – if the furious beating of her heart was anything to go by. She picked up her pace, easily passing my leisurely stride and flew passed me into the meadow. I let her lead.

It was sunny, like Alice had told me it was going to be. Today was going to be all about unveiling secrets. She'd have to see me broken.

I stood in the tree line, watching her as she spun around in between the violet, yellow, and red wildflowers. She bent down to pick up a soft white one. She was dazzling in the overcast clouds of Forks, Washington. She was even more breathtaking here. Somebody could very well mistake her for a vampire. Her auburn hair glinted a raw fire in the buttery sunshine, her skin as luminous as mine or Alice's.

It was clear then, even if I hated to admit it.

Bella Swan was _made_ to be a vampire. There was no other alternatives.

I leaned against an old spruce, listening as its life hummed into my ears. Bella turned halfway – a stunned expression on her face. She was even more taken aback when she noticed I wasn't behind her. Her eyebrows furrowed into a crease and her lips pulled into a pout as she whirled around, apparently looking for me.

My chuckle at how adorable she was alerted my presence. She took a step towards me, her eyes alight with curiosity. I suppose my own were wary and reluctant. She took another step. I held my hand up in warning. I took a large breath, flipped my hair out of my face and stepped out into the sun.

Her reaction to my sparkling vampire ass was shocking. At first, it was a sweet gasp. Then an appreciative check out with a wild heart thudding against a fleshy chest. Then, finally,

Laughter.

She was fucking laughing.

The sound was a happy sound, immediately flipping a smile onto my own lips, but then it fell. What was she laughing at?

"Bella?" I took a hesitant step towards her, unsure if I had finally broke through her last level of sanity or not. "Are you okay?"

"No!" She yelled, respective tears rolling down her face. "It isn't fair!"

I reached her, dropping to my knees and taking her hands. "What isn't fair, honey?"

"You're so beautiful!" She gasped out between her tears. "Are you lying to me? Have you been? Are you secretly Aphrodite or something? Nobody should be as dazzling as you!" She finished hysterically, dropping to her knees in front of me. I sat stunned, very, very confused about what was actually happening.

"Aphrodite?" Was the only brain dead response I could get out of my mouth. She sobbed more.

"I'm sorry! I'm ruining our evening, aren't I? It just takes me by surprise. All. The. Time. I'm okay now." She wiped her hand to her eyes. She glared at the smile gracing my lips. "What are you smiling about?"

"I'm inherently pleased that you think I'm beyond words." I teased. Her pretty little mouth dropped open and her white hands shot out to shove me down. Of course she wasn't nearly as strong as me, but I could play her little game.

Falling backwards, I took her hands with me, pulling her so that she was straddling me. She gasped (something she had been doing an awful lot of) but instead of pulling back, she leaned closer down to my face.

Was this it? Was this the long lost kiss that I had been day dreaming of ever since I saw her? I closed my eyes and parted my lips barley, only allowing enough space for her bottom lip (because I had not actually measured the plumpness of her lips in my mind, waiting for this moment. Nope. No. Absolutely not. That's really creepy.)

I tasted warm peppermint breath, and the smell of winter, hit my lips. She was going to kiss me!

Oh.

No.

Never mind.

False alarm guys! Bella's only a tease.

Instead, Bella had leaned forward to study my sparkling face. Her warm – yet at the same time dark and mysterious –brown eyes flecked with golden green and fiery blue shot all over my face. Studying my face like I was a precious gem.

"Close your eyes again, please." She requested softly, head rushing breath running all over my face. I gulped in as much as I could before I did as she asked. "Wow. Your eyelashes are so long." Bella ran her fingers over said lashes. "Were they always this long when you were a human?"

"U-uh. I never measured them. I remember them getting tangled up during lessons. But they probably did grow a couple millimeters when I was transformed." I stuttered. Ridiculous how a mere human could do this to me. I felt her hair brush against my skin, and I could only assume that she was nodding.

"And the reason you're so pale is because you don't have any blood?"

"Very good." I sighed, her hands had taken place now.

"Then how come your lips are so red?"

I popped my eyes open to see that her eyes were indeed on my lips. I closed them before she noticed. "Vampire allure."

"Bela Lugosi?"

I open one eye to glare at her curiously before shutting it again. "Have you been on the internet, Bella?" I didn't need the sudden rush of heat over my face to know that she was blushing. "Find anything interesting?"

"N-no!"

"Oh?" I teased, this time leaving my eyes open. "Pray tell."

"Rose! Lay back down."

"Bella!" I mocked her outraged voice. "Not until you tell me."

She huffed, and shifted on my lap. I bit my lip and gritted my teeth as an alternative to moaning. Sitting her on my lap really wasn't a good idea after all. "Well," She went on, mumbled bashfully, pressing her warm face into my neck, "I heard – read rather – that you all are very … uh… sexual?" She hurried on at my lack of expression. "Or uh… appealing? That you were the succubus and stuff. L-Look uh… I just read that so. I don't think it means anything! Or if it does I don't mind! I—"

"Bella, shh." I quieted her, quite amused at her innocence. "That's true I guess for some. Like the Denali coven for instance. We aren't however. It is true that we are very appealing. But we don't harm humans. Like Carlisle said, we feed from animals. We believe that every life is precious." I finished my dramatic, existential crisis rant quickly, in utter hopes that I wouldn't frighten her.

She merely looked fascinated. "But why?"

"Why what?" I was baffled.

"Why do you believe that?"

Oh. "Why not? Why would anyone even dream of being a monster?"

Her gaze hardened and she locked her fingers around my face. "Rosalie – something – Hale. You are _not_ a monster. Do you understand me? Say that you understand me by repeating after my words, okay? One, two, three. I, Rosalie Hale am not a monster. Say it."

"My middle name is Lillian."

"I don't think you understood the assignment—Wait what? Lillian?"

"Yeah." I nodded slightly brushing her hair back. "Parents back in the 1900's, you know?

"No. I don't know." She shook her head at me. "Does this mean that I get to hear about your old life now?"

"It isn't pretty."

"I'll show you mine, if you show me yours."

"It really isn't pretty. Nor does it have a happy ending. But which of ours does? If that were the case we'd all be under grave stones by now."

Why did I say that? Now her face had taken on a beautiful sad but understanding look. She leaned down closer and propped herself up on her hands beside my head. My breath hitched. I had forgotten she was this close to me. Bella started to nod her head slowly, then stopped and shook her head in a rapid progression.

"No. Not today. I don't want to ruin today, if that doesn't bother you that is… It's just sunny – and warm too!" She stopped to sigh before continuing in a whisper. "Why would you ruin something so light with darkness?"

I reached up to fiddle with her black sweater and white collared shirt that matched mine completely. Alice's idea, if it wasn't obvious. "You got a deal, pretty girl, I honestly didn't know how I was going to word it anyway."

"But this doesn't mean we are avoiding it."

"Of course not. Just gathering our thoughts for a rainy day."

Bella grazed her eyes over my face approvingly. I had said the right thing.

Apparently, that wasn't enough to keep her here. She pushed herself up, and rolled over so she was by my side on her back. "I forgot what the sun looked like." Bella joked dryly with a sarcastic snort. I choked out a laugh because I haven't. I had just found the sun. And I had no intention of ever letting her die out again. I'd never would've dreamed that I'd need somebody like her. This world is only going to break her heart, and I suppose it was my duty to make sure that she would get through heartbreak.

"You still haven't told me everything there is to being a vampire."

Of. Course. "Well, when we are transformed, this liquid that contains the very depths of Hell enters our blood stream – which ultimately changes us – Honestly, Bella, we are rather boring creatures, what's there to learn about?" I twisted my head sideways to look at her. My answer was something like I'll-slap-you-this-very-moment-if-you-don't-show-me-the-wonders-of-the-vampire-forest-you-blonde-shit-bag-I-don't-care-if-it-breaks-my-hand-basic-bitch-. Bella's face didn't actually convey that, but I could read in between the lines. "It makes us the perfect hunters. The world's scariest predators." I said, standing up to pace. Bells sat up on her hands to watch me with growing interest.

"Everything about us is magnified. Everything that attracts you to us is the result of an atrocity that shouldn't exist. My face, my voice, even my smell pulls you in. As if I'd need any of that." I ran a hand violently through my hair and looked at her. _Cool down the intensity, Rosalie._ But she merely looked curious.

"Why wouldn't you need any of that?" She was sitting up now, in a crossed leg position with her head tilted to the side. I bent down to pick up a rock and walked to present it to her like a dog playing fetch.

"This is why." I pinched it between my fingers. The rock groaned before turning to dust and spitting micro pebbles onto the soft forest floor. Bella's eyes widened quickly with wonder. She shifts forward onto her knees to take the grey sand out of my hand to play with it. It ran through her fingers in thin streams before she says

"Holy fuck, Rose. That's wicked cool."

I blurted out laughing. Of course Bella would think it was cool. Of course she would totally disregard the danger she was currently in. It was so Bella. "Yeah, it is huh?"

She nodded with a small smile on her face, but ducked her head shyly and asked. "Rosalie? Why does it seem that Edward can read minds and Alice can predict what is going to happen next?"

"That's because they can." Bella's heart stopped beating for a millisecond.

"Edward can read my mind?" She asked again in angst.

"Well, no, he can read everybody else's. But he can't read yours, I promise."

She took a relieved breath before falling back down to the ground, and she asked. "Hey, Rose? When did you knew you like girls?"

Girls in pale makeup and rough hands and hair ripping out and cod alleyways flashed through my mind a thousand times a minute. "I had a feeling that I liked girls, too. But a particular event solidified it for me." I commented slowly, but flipped over so I was facing her. "What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Girls or boys?"


End file.
